Post # 1
Hi! I will cut to the chase.
My “boyfriend” and I have been together for almost 2 years. He is 20 and I am 19( for a few more months) We have been together since my senior year of high school and have known each other since sophomore year. He proposed to me after 12 days of us dating (haha and I said yes but hey! Puppy love makes you do crazy things!) We didn’t announce anything because we knew what the reaction would be. Especially my family’s reaction. Well to make a long story shorter his sister ended up finding out and then his mom so we announced it to his family and they were (are) really happy for us. I talked to my mom and she said that she would like us to be more stable first (and she is right.) Well 2 years from the actual proposal we are happy. We have grown together through difficult times and learned a lot from each other and are growing together everyday. (BTW he wants to be officially engaged almost more than me! lol)
So I feel like I am ready to make our engagement official and everything. A lot of people say if you have to ask then the answer is no but I think just wanting to be sure I am not just rushing is ok. So..
Do you think 20 is too young to be engaged? (We won’t get married for another 2 1/2 years)
If you had a long engagement did it work for you?
Did any of your family have a bad reaction to your engagement?
Post # 3
I was ready to marry my SO at 20, so I can’t point any fingers, but I would be prepared for some flack. It just comes with the territory. And be strong because YOU know your history and that you’re ready and that’s all that matters.
I’m 22 now and I still have people telling me to “wait!”, “don’t rush”, but my SO and I have been together for 5 1/2 years, own a home together, and have been living together for 2 years. Any of our friends and family will be like “finally”, but to those who don’t know us, I still expect the “you’re so young”.
Post # 4
If you are ready and both of you are happy, then go for it!
No one has a right to say you are not ready/ too young. That’s something that only you and your SO will know.
Good Luck and Congratulations!
Post # 5
I agree with PP. Be prepared to take some slack from some people for being young and engaged, but be confident in your choices. It’s your life, not theirs.
Post # 6
I personally think 20 is too young to b eengaged but this is your life and you are an adult so if this is what you want, then so be it.
Post # 7
I would say it’s too young, but that’s because looking back at when my current SO & I were together at 20, we felt so much older than our peers but we were still so young compared to the rest of the world. I’ve been with my SO for 6 years and we met when we were 19. Our relationship is sooooo much different now (in a really good way) and I’m happy to get engaged soon versus 4 years ago in almost your shoes, even though I wanted to. The way I see it, is there any reason to get engaged so long before you get married? You’ll get so much pressure from others outside of your family & friends to slow down and so many questions, etc. that is it worth it to add that stress to your relationship? What matters is you know in your heart and your SO/FI knows, so is there really a need to have proof with a ring? Bottom line, you’re an adult, it’s your life, do what you want. But what’s the real reason behind wanting to get officially engaged?
And congrats on finding the one!! I don’t mean to play so much devil’s advocate, I just like posing questions, they help me in my waiting too.
Post # 8
Thanks so much for your advice guys! I really appreciate the good and the bad and everything! I needed someone to give me the realities of it all so thanks all!