(Closed) His parents are meting mine, ack!

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
3206 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

It occurs to me that in 9 years of dating, our parents have yet to meet. They have nothing in common, and I think it will be a disaster when they do meet. 


Post # 4
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Ours all met after 7 years of dating.  No one really likes each other.  Fortunately, they will probably never meet again, since DH’s family lives across the country.

Post # 5
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Ours will probably only ever meet once – on the weddign weekend. I’m totally nervous about that, but what can you do? His parents are from overseas.

Post # 7
2374 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

It’ll be fine!  Our parents met once we became functionally permanent – we’d been living together a while, and everyone knew we weren’t going anywhere.  We’ve all been to dinner together maybe 3 or 4 times now.  They’re not BFFs or anything, but everyone’s polite and nice and gets along just fine.  Unless they’ve got no social graces, I’m sure everyone will smile, make small talk and be fine.

Post # 8
7641 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Honestly, I can’t even remember, lol. That is how significant it was. Our mom’s met each other first, I know that. Other than that I have no idea when everyone met everyone else, but there were no issues.

Post # 9
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

My mother had met his mother when he sent us all ring shopping!  Then everyone met everyone right after we got engaged; I arranged for all of us to have dinner together so they could meet and become friends.  It went great (better than I expected)!  It’s not like they plan to hang out all the time now, just family functions but good to know they get along.

Post # 10
629 posts
Busy bee

I was nervous about our parents meeting, they’re about as different as can be. My parents are intellectual, but my dad has always worked blue collar jobs for the longest time (it gives him more freedom to be an intellectual in the areas he prefers) and my mom has been a stay at home mom/housewife most of my life. His mom is a VP of investor relations of a bank, who only takes on extremely wealthy clients, his father is retired, worked for his father, and lives off his parents’ money, never really earning his own way. His parents always wanted him to marry a Jewish girl from a well off family. 

Thankfully, everyone got along. Our moms met over a Mother’s Day brunch, then we brought my dad over to his mom’s place for dinner (met SO’s older brother too). My mom officially met his dad at SO’s birthday this year, and we added my dad into the mixture when I visited the mikvah for my conversion. the only variable that still bothers me is SO’s step father. He’s somewhat bigoted, and only likes people who are rich, white, and Jewish (bonus points if you’re South African). As my parents only score 1 of 3, with no bonus points, I’m nervous. Thankfully, they probably won’t meet until we’re engaged and having an engagement party, and he wouldn’t dare be a jerk in front of all his in laws, and all my family. Thing is, when surrounded by his friends from back home, he’s made disparaging remarks to me, so I’m on my guard.

Post # 11
1191 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Laurenplusalex:  Ha, this made me realize my parents and his parents have never met.  Such a relief, too, because I could totally see my mom and his mom having a snip-fest.

Post # 12
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Oh goodness, I’m sure it would be interesting. They are all extremely nice, polite people, but his family is very conservative/religious (rural Montana!) and not nearly as education-focused, while my family is very intellectual and liberal… 

There is a lot of potential for issue-clashing, there are definitely a lot of things they do NOT agree on. Hopefully those just never get mentioned when they are in the same room (probably only at the wedding) out of respect – both families really love us together so they’ll have to just focus on that! 


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