(Closed) His parents are upset about our invitation wording

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 62
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

You are definitely in the right here. My parent’s are paying for about half the wedding and we are paying for the other half and this is how we are wording our invites. Maybe the Portugese invitation portion can be worded something along the lines of “Together with their families.” That way both parents will be satisified. Your fiance should definitely take point on this one and deal with his family.

Post # 63
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

This was a huge fight in our planning as well. My parents are paying for about 70% of the wedding, we are paying for about 25% and his family is only paying for the alcohol. I never had a problem with his family only paying for the alcohol, as that is tradition and my parents had been saving to pay for my wedding since I was a little girl.

The issue only arose when his mom told me that she had “better be listed as a host”. I don’t like being bullied into things and I didn’t think it was fair considering my parents were paying for so much… I felt like being the hosts of the wedding was sort of their moment in the spotlight. My Fiance sided with his mom and said that we should do it out of respect and I stood my ground stating I didn’t want to offend my parents. After lots of fighting and tears we ended up compromising and going with:

Daddy Cupcake & Mommy Cupcake
Invite you to share in their joy
as thier daughter
Cuppycake
is united in marriage to
Mr CUppycake
Son of Notthing is ever easy and Has an Opinion on Everything

We kept the wording a secret from everyone until the invitations were delivered, that way no one could complain. His parents were still unhappy but you can’t win them all :o)

Post # 64
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

View original reply
@Miss CuppyCake: That is hilarious. I love it. Both the wording and the fact that you kept the invitations a secret are cheeky and bold moves. You sound like the kind of girl I would like to know.

Post # 65
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’d keep it the way YOU want it and make them get over it.  There are SO many “battles” to pick in weddng planning….and lord knows my family never lets things die, however….the traditional way you had it was perfect and that’s that.

Post # 66
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I know that there is going to be a battle over the invitations, like many, I have done the traditional wording where his mother (his father is deceased) is not even mentioned.  This is what I wanted, but the kicker was when my mother (who has bent over backwards to let us have everything we wanted and yes, she is paying for everything) burst into tears over having his mother’s name on the invitation and told me she was done and if it his mother’s name went on the invitation, she was done with the wedding.  Did I mention my Future Mother-In-Law is a real piece of work who tries to dominate everything???

Post # 67
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We had issues with the number of parents, step parents, whos paying, who’s not paying… yaadadayayda.

 

Solution:

“Together with their Parents

Bride

and

Groom

invite you to… “

 

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