- 1 year ago
So this is my first post on here so please be kind..
I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and we’ve always been honest from the start about what we want in terms of marriage/kids and life.
During out first few months of being together, I fell pregnant but due to where we were in our lives we were not able to keep it. That however has made us stronger. I moved to his town (about 1 hour 30 mins from my town) and in with him. We’re in the process of decorating his house and making it our own. I’m over the moon we are making our lives together.
We’ve been to a few wedding receptions since I moved here (invites from my work) and being a typical girl, I can’t help but fantasise about ours. I’ve mentioned various wedding things to him. Sometimes he bites and we have a lengthy convo and other times he’s disinterested (typical man!).
I’ve made it clear to him that in an ideal world, I’d love to be married and have my first child (on the way or born) before I’m 30 (I’m currently 25). I know life doesn’t always go to plan but my mum and dad were older parents and I want to be younger. He’s perfectly accepting of this and understands this is where I want to be.
However, recently when I’ve brought up marriage/kids he seems to be off the idea. He said yesterday that me falling pregnant has made him feel like he completely isn’t ready for kids and marriage. I’ve said I’m not asking him to get down on one knee here and now but I want him to know where I stand. He says that he always believed he would know when he was meant to move in together, get married, have kids… But now he’s grown up he just isn’t sure when those things are meant to happen?!
I don’t want to end up like one of those movies where the boy and girl stay together and she thinks he’ll propose, only for him to turn around and say that was never his intention.
Yesterday, whilst we were in town we stopped outside a jewellers to look at watches for him. we walked down the window displays until we reached the diamond rings! We just browsed and then he pointed out a few rings he didn’t like for various reasons (too big, too blingy) to which I agreed as I would only like a small diamond. We continued and came acorss the perfect ones and I told him the style I liked so the band and diamond have proportion etc..
Above there was a display advertising how to create your perfect unique engaement ring and we started looking at the different band types on it. I said how I really hate diamonds being too raised and the little particulars I liked. We have similar taste!
Now Bees, Sorry for the waffle but I’m so confused! I feel like one minute we’re 100% building our lives together – hence decorating/moving in together (actions can speak louder than words) and other times I feel like that isn’t where we are going..
Is he just trying to get me off the scent? Lower my expectations? Not think about it as it’s not coming soon?
Thank you for reading and I look forward to your advice.
Much love xx