- 5 years ago
I’ve been with my guy for almost five years and have lived with him for four years. He bought a new place without my knowing first, which of course I can’t say anything about since we aren’t married, don’t share finances, and I’m not at all financing the place. He says its just his next venture, like buying a car. Thing is, he won’t even call it “our place”. He won’t. I’ve talked to him about this and he says, “you don’t call your car that bought with your own money ‘our car’, do you?” I even said I’d like to help out with the renovation expenses or the actual purchase of the place. He said, “no, don’t worry about it. I don’t expect you to pay for any of it. Besides, it’s just easier this way.” I’m done talking this to death with him, and he seems content with the outcome, so why should I bother? I guess he’s not that concerned with money or sees how my offer may be beneficial. I mean, he does enjoy his trips with his friends. I talk to him about this one too, and he calls my bluff, saying, “now, you know you’re not the kind to take any vacation time off from work.” He’s even mentioned how he’s glad I’ve become close friends with co-worker who is single, probably so he doesn’t feel bad going out with the guys throughout the week. What do I do? I really, really do love him, can’t fathom live without him, but how do I get him to realize he’s not 20 anymore and it’s time to take this to the next level?