(Closed) holding hands/hugging with a friend? advice quickly needed!

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: is it ok to hold hands/ hug with a friend you want to be closer to without it being romantic/sexual?

    yes

    no

    other

  • Post # 108
    Member
    595 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    Absolutely inappropriate, both the hand-holding & the snuggling. I feel like his gf would not want him in those situations, and your SO probably wouldn’t be too thrilled, either. Those are not “friendly” things to do, they’re romantic things.

    Post # 109
    Member
    657 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    View original reply
    @scarlette:  you need to talk to your SO about this and work on creating new experiences with him

     

    Post # 110
    Member
    624 posts
    Busy bee

    You are clearly with the wrong man so do the right thing and end it with him for his sake.  Then take time to develop an appropriate relationship with a single, available man and keep your hands off everyone else’s! If the girls on here think your behaviour is ‘weird’ I can assure you a man is not going to analyse it that hard – a man is just going to think you are coming on to him!!

    Post # 111
    Member
    646 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    hugging hello/goodbye is totally appropriate to me (me and my male friends do it), but holding hands is not. and i would mind my SO holding hands with another girl.

    Post # 112
    Member
    1114 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I’m a very cuddly person, and I think hugging friends, whether male or female, is completely OK as long as it’s not all the time.  But holding hands?  Definitely something which is symbolic of something more than friendship.

    Post # 113
    Member
    379 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I don’t think most people would be okay with it personally. A quick hug to say hello or goodbye, or even a peck on the cheek might be okay (I do this with a friend’s boyfriend). But anything more affectionate, like holding hands or touches or lingering hugs, would upset me as his Girlfriend.

    Post # 114
    Member
    1 posts
    Wannabee

    A lot of people are giving you trouble for wanting to do this. It is all relative. Plenty of people kiss each other’s cheeks as a friendly greeting. Who cares if you hold hands? As long as both of you are good with it, why not? I would and my wife certainly would never care.

    Post # 115
    Member
    28 posts
    Newbee

    Speaking from someone who sort of experienced this, I was in a pretty serious relationship in my last 2 1/2 years of college, and knew this was the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. 

    However, I did have a lot of guys friends (what I considered just friends) but there were ones that I wanted to get hugs from or hold hands/get close with, and it kind of made me realize that as hard as I could deny it and as much as I loved my boyfriend, I had a crush on another guy. Maybe that isn’t how you feel since you say you really aren’t sexually attracted to him and he has a girlfriend.

    I think sometimes while maybe both people already have partners, they find someone else who really “gets” them and they want that physical connection like they have with their partner (even in just a non-sexual sense). Sometimes you both find the person you’re meant for even while dating someone else, but either way it makes you stop and think if you really like this person, would you leave your partner for them, or would you rather respect your current partner by not hanging around this “friend” if that means it could potentially  save you from damaging your relationship with your S.O.?

     

    Hope this makes sense

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