(Closed) Holiday Cards Before You’re Engaged

posted 11 years ago in Waiting
Post # 17
35 posts
  • Wedding: May 2010

We’ll save ours for the first Christmas after we’re married. I think it’ll be more special that way. But, to each their own!

Post # 18
1726 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I personally wouldn’t. I don’t want to glorify our non-marital status any more than I already am by playing wifey under the same roof — lol! I guess what I really mean is what Killer Queen said, I want it to be special as a married/starting a new family thing. But that’s just me.

Post # 19
591 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We sent out joint christmas cards the past two years (3 years into our relationship and before we were engaged) and everyone loved them! It did create some questions though. Some of my FI’s extended family asked me at a family get together whether marriage was in our future since we had started sending out joint christmas cards. It just kind of made sense since we were serious about one another and each of our families treated each of us like family anyway! I say go for it 🙂

Post # 20
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

We have always done ours together. Of course…we have lived together since the beginning too. No one in his family finds it strange. For presents one year we bought a bunch of nice frames and gave them framed pictures of us together and everyone loved them. I think it really depends on the family.

Post # 21
251 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

This is our first year to send cards together, I wanted to wait until we were married. It just seemed a little too eager to send them out before.

Post # 22
13561 posts
Honey Beekeeper

This is really up to personal preference. I personally would wait, but that’s just my opinion.

Post # 23
43 posts

If you live together already, then I don’t see a problem with it.  If not, then you could discuss it between you…

Post # 24
6889 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Go for it. Especially if you live together or are in a LTR, if you are both comfortable with it. You could also do you, SO, and your cat. Like a “family” picture. I’m pretty sure anyone you’re sending it to gets your situation.

My mother is including him in our family Christmas cards. I know, makes me sound young that I still do family Christmas cards doesn’t it? Lol. I have a much younger sister (read: 6 years old) that my family adopted a few years ago. It is important to my Mom that I stay involved in family things like the card, etc, to solidify that relationship (I had already moved away to college when the adoption was final) So the age range of “kids” on the card is from her at 6 to me…with the brothers in between. Also, Fiance and I live together and are engaged, so he is already “part of the family.” My parents see him as their “son,” so no, not weird to me. When we’re married we’ll do our own cards, and if we wanted to now, we would. We do live together, and have for almost 2 years.


Post # 25
3457 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I guess I don’t see what the big deal is.  If you would be embarrassed by folks perhaps misinterpreting then sure, hold off.  But otherwise, why not?  My family and friends that would receive the cards would know we weren’t engaged and wouldn’t leap to any erroneous conclusions.  And if they did, I’d be ok setting them straight.  (Actually, it might be pretty funny if that *was* how i introduced it.  My sister found out a close cousin was engaged through facebook and ever since she’s reminded me frequently that she does not wish to hear about “any major life updates through Facebook.”)  I get cards addressed all the time by my friends and family to the both of us even though until just a few weeks ago we weren’t even living together.  (Rather like even though they call the one of us, they pass along a hi/good wishes to the other.)  I admit that I don’t send out cards (much less photo cards) because I am too lazy/not got my act together, but I wouldn’t hesitate to sign both our names, so why not send a picture of your “life” which includes your SO as an important part of it?  My picture of the two of us on our trips is no less valid than other peoples who are married…  So I say, why not?

Post # 26
26 posts
  • Wedding: May 2010

I say go for it if he becomes okay with it.  We sent out a Christmas card last year with a picture of us and our dog.  We weren’t engaged yet and weren’t (and still aren’t) living together, and all we got were compliments.  Everyone was happy to get a picture of us and get an update on our lives.

Post # 27
4544 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We sent holiday cards out our first year together because we were living together but we weren’t engaged. As long as your SO is cool with it, why not?

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