(Closed) Holidays and the inlaws… Send me to the beach instead!!!!

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
9139 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@msmaddox:  Maybe a year on strike will whip her back into shape?  My dad gets super grabby about spending time together during the holidays.  Every few years I go on strike and plan a Christmas trip away with my SO or stay home and enjoy whatever holiday it is alone.  Since I instituted that policy, dad (and the rest of the fam) has learned to appreciate whatever time I make myself available for holidays.

Post # 5
5162 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@msmaddox:  Ugh! I feel you on this. My Fiance and I will be spending Christmas apart this year (his family is 5 hours away and I wasn’t ready to not see my family this yr or vice versa) and after we get married, we will have to alternate holidays. When I mentioned this at Thanksgiving to his mom, she said, “UM NO! I DONT THINK SO!!!” and flipped out! Luckily his cousin came to my rescue as she is also married and alternates. But REALLY- she honestly thought I’d just ditch my family every year at Christmas?????? 

I am also going to put a foot down once we have children. I want my kids to wake up in their own house – I don’t want santa going to grandma/grandpas house, I want him to come to OUR house with our own traditions. Whoever wants to join us, can! 

Post # 6
1301 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Ugh, I know just how you feel.  Because we spent Thanksgiving at my parents’ house, Fiance and I are going to his parents for Christmas.  The thing is, my family invited his to come have Thanksgiving with us all, so he still saw his family at Thanksgiving.  I wasn’t even technically invited to Christmas, Fiance just told his parents I’m coming.  His mom has told my Fiance and other people that I’m controlling and once we’re married she’ll never see her son again, even though we visit a few times a year and Fiance will go visit on his own.  They live 6 hours away! So, I’m trying to “prove” that I’m not that type of person, but it just sucks to know that she doesn’t really want me there and expects Fiance to ditch me on holidays.

Post # 7
46612 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Don’t worry about what she tells everyone else. I am sure that by now all her family and friends have figured out that she is an emotional blackmailer and a liar.

You were very clear in your communications. She knew about Christmas Eve and was invited to attend. Stick to your plans.

She is behaving like a child with a temper tantrum in the hopes that the parenst will give in.

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