- 4 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
We are getting married at a church outside our parish. We have had it booked for months. AT the outset we asked if they preferred for one of their priests to celebrate, or if they wanted us to arrange for a priest from our home parish – we totally didn’t care which; we don’t have a personal relationship with our home priest, so whatever was simplest.
So, the parish secretary puts it in the book. This is back in April or something. We are doing the paperwork at our home parish, and it was dragging out a bit getting my fiancée’s baptismal certificate and form 2. Meanwhile, parish secretary at the church where our wedding will be refuses to let us meet with the priest there who she says wants to be the one to officiate. She will not give us any information or access, at any time, until our paperwork is done, she says. Like, serioulsy, we have never MET the priest who is going to marry us (we’ve gone to mass there a couple of times, but it’s never been him celebrating).
So our paperwork is finally done, and is being mailed off to the parish where the wedding is. I give it a week. I call up and say “ok. Let’s go. Let’s have a meeting with fr. Rudy and get the ceremony planned. Readings. Music. Flower Petals. Door Prizes. The whole thing.” Well, I’m quite lucky, since the secretary is away on holiday and someone else is filling in who, apparently, is not aware of the policy of obfuscation. Turns out, the parish has a wedding coordinator. Let me reiterate – we booked our wedding at this church in April or March, and, THIS PAST TUESDAY, I find out there is a wedding coordinator. I get her number. I call her. She’s like “August 24th, right?” I say “no, August 31st.” No one has told the person in charge of weddings about our wedding. I’m not kidding, not even a little bit.
Also, it seems the paperwork has not arrived – OR they lost it, or the secretary hid it because she doesn’t like us, or something.
But anyway, so I get a call on Friday. Yes. Friday, August 2nd. Our wedding is on August 31st. Fr. RegularPastor will be on a retreat the weekend of our wedding. I hear this, I’m going ok, that’s fine, because you’re about to tell me the name of the priest who is filling in for him. Well, he’s from out of the province and isn’t licenced to officiate a wedding in BC. So, apparently, this makes it MY PROBLEM that we don’t have a priest to celebrate our wedding.
It seems quite obvious that the parish secretary took it upon herself to consider our wedding tentative, and not tell anyone else at the church that it was going to happen. Because, after all, we aren’t from their parish, so we must not be serious. Or something. I don’t know. SO. ANGRY.
I left a voice mail for our home parish priest, and asked him if he can celebrate the wedding. He was perfectly willing to at first, and said he’d go with whatever the wedding church wanted to do. I have not heard back, and hopefully he is still available, but this all could have been arranged MONTHS ago if there hadn’t been some random church employee deciding not to take our wedding seriously, and act professionally, and like it was a real thing.
I mean, honestly. If we only cared about it being in a pretty church, and weren’t concerned about a Catholic wedding, we’d have picked a pretty United or Anglican church or something, since there are way way fewer hoops to jump through, i’s to dot, and t’s to cross.
HOLY CRAP I AM FRUSTRATED.