(Closed) Home birth? I'd love to hear your story

posted 5 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 33
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’ve tried to post this site several times, but it won’t take so do a google search on Hurt by Homebirth

Post # 34
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

This site is purposefully not allowing me to post the link to Hurt by Homebirth. Please go read the stories there and bring a tissue…

Post # 36
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

“A few years removed from the active practice of midwifery now, I find myself wondering how I allowed myself to become so convinced that having and encouraging others to have a nonhospital birth was such a good idea. I called up a friend who had two home births, the last one with me, and asked her, “If you had to buy a car seat for your baby, and one car seat had been rated by Consumer Reports as having two to three times the risk of death or profound injury compared to other car seats, would you buy that car seat?” “Of course not,” she replied. “What if it was the most beautiful, comfortable car seat in the world, really easy to carry around, easy to install, and your baby would just love sitting in it?” I continued. “No way,” she replied. “What would you say about a parent who did buy that car seat?” I asked. “I’d say they were making a poor decision.””

 

“If a mother was considering a nonhospital birth to avoid interventions, even though she was totally aware of the increased risk to her baby, I would encourage her to speak to mothers who have lost babies before making such a choice. I spoke to one such mother online under the condition of anonymity: “I didn’t realize the risks when I was pregnant. I thought having a c-section was the worst possible outcome, so I chose home birth to avoid that. I wish to God I hadn’t abhorred the idea of a c-section so much. I lost my child because I chose home birth, and I wouldn’t have at the hospital. I wish I would have instead been in the hospital, upset that I had a cesarean but holding a live baby, instead of at home with empty arms.” I asked her, “How many surgeries is a baby worth?” She replied instantly: “A million.””

Post # 39
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

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FoolsintheRain:   The honest midwife PDF article does looks at the studies that are out there. She was a mid-wife that practiced in a non-hospital setting. She tells you what it was like, the risks she took and why she left. And What ifs and Fears and Duoula Dani (by the same person) is a doula that no longer does non-hospital births. She also explains how the non-hospital midwives skew the facts and why she changed her beliefs (she wanted to do a home birth for her 2nd pregnancy). From what I read, the death rate for hospital births is 3 per 10,000 for low risk pregnancy. Non-hospital death rate is 16 per 10,000. Even if you take into account high risk pregnancies, it is still lower than non-hospital deaths. 

Yes, you will hear lots of stories of good experiences of home births, since only 16 out of 10,000 end in death. But that is 3-5 times higher than hospital births. Would you buy a car seat or crib that had a death rate 3-5 times higher than a safer product? 

If you are going to do a home or non-hospital birth, please read the guidelines listed on both the Honest Midwife and What If and Fears sites. Read about how best to protect yourself and your baby. Look at the lies that some midwives tell. Also look at the different certifications. Also realize that even if you are only 5 mins from the hospital, it can take much longer to get from your bed/bath/couch to the car to the hospital and checked in and sent to the right department. And ambulances have protocols that may mean you have to give birth before they take you to the hospital. 

As a grieving Mom, who never, ever thought something like this would happen to her, I urge you to find a great OB who shares your beliefs or a midwife at a birthing center attached to a hospital. 

Post # 40
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

That study you linked to, the PDF article I linked to analyzes that study. The basic flaw is that is in Canada which has a very, very different midwife system than we do in the US. They have very strict regulations on who is a candidate and work very closely with hospitals. Every study not done is the US is usless to determine the risks and safety of the US system. 

Post # 41
Member
421 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

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KoiKove:  I want to state right away that I am in no way pro-home birth and I am not pushing any agenda. It is important to raise awareness about the risks of home birth and the very important considerations that must be made when one is considering it for themselves.

I just wanted to point out that 

View original reply
FoolsintheRain and I are both in Canada, and so we are concerned with the Canadian context when it comes to our decision.

That being said, I am still on the fence as to whether I will choose a home birth again for the next baby because of the risks. It is true that I was very fortunate to have had a great experience and to have been left unscathed by it, but it was a decision made in the heat of the moment and the outcome could have been far different. I will be doing my research this time around, but focusing on local evidence and data as everyone should.

I am very sorry you had to endure what you did, and I can only imagine the grief you carry with you. It is very courageous of you to share your story and try to warn other moms and moms-to-be.

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 3 months ago by  PlusOne.
Post # 44
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

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FoolsintheRain:  I’m sorry this thread got hijacked. I’m having a home birth in February and I too would love to hear some stories from other bees. I’be read so many stories on birth without fear and the other sites but it would be nice to hear some from people I can talk with. For some reason home birth is still really taboo even though the studies support its safety. 

 

 I hope we get some more stories here, and if I can find the thread in February, I’ll post my story. 😁

Post # 45
Member
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

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GooteyBootey:  Im sorry to hear that you had a haemorrhage but its just not true to suggest that if youd birthed at home you “wouldnt have made it”.  Home birth midwives are equipped and trained to deal with exactly this situation.  You may also have had risk factors for PPH emerge withing your labour that would have caused your midwife to transfer you in prior to birth.  Congratulations on the birth of your baby.

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