(Closed) "Homophobic" Florist

posted 8 years ago in LGBTQ
Post # 47
Member
1136 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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@KelannaDC  The funny thing is: I actually haven’t experienced any homophobia during this wedding planning (or in my real life at all).  I know I’ve been very fortunate, but I just haven’t.  My family accepted my wife from the moment they met her.  My co-workers and friends have too.  Also, since most of my close friends are LGBTQ, it’s never an issue.  I’d have to “come out” if I ever got with a man again. lol 


I’m so pleased that you have not had to experience this before, I hope she is just one sad out of touch woman in the whole scheme of your wedding.  Good luck with the rest of your planning. 

Post # 48
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

EWW.. sorry that happened to you =( I defintely wouldn’t use them!  Someone mentioned she was uneducated, but I would say it’s more of a beliefs system to people like that.  Her business tactics are poor.. I am trying to think of the word, but I can’t quite place it.  When people aren’t really experienced in situations, so their tact is anything but respectful when it gets presented to them.  I am not in any way trying to defend her, I just like to let everyone have their own beliefs/opinions.  It’s just too bad she is discounting the idea of meeting such great people!!

I hope you don’t have to deal with many other vendors like that, and there’s always a plus side: You can find a way more fantastic florist =)  

Post # 49
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Maybe I’m being thick but I don’t understand why you had to ask her if she was ok with gay marriage? It’s not her job to give her opinion, she only has to arrange flowers. I wouldn’t have even mentioned it since YOU are paying for HER time. She has a business to run and she’s shot herself in the foot. No I wouldn’t use her but I still don’t see where the gay marriage conversation would have even entered into it. I never mentioned I was marrying a man when I went to see my florist and neither did she ask. I do feel sorry for homophobes and their narrowminded views but unfortunately  there are lots still about.

Post # 50
Member
872 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Wow. 

That is just as dumb as a pharmist denying a girl birth control because it goes against his moral standing. Don’t get me wrong, I am a Christian but if you are going to be in this type of business why the F*** would you be selective? 

This is totally up to you and I understand if you would be against it but maybe the next time you contact a florist or other vendor (minus the venue) consider not telling them you’re gay a ceremony, is a ceremony, is a ceremony it should not make a difference in the wedding world, they are getting paid for crying out loud. 

Post # 51
Member
9125 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I am really sorry that this happened to you. I agree that it is a shame that people still think this way.

But I can kind of see what starry and sweetchick are getting at- you did ask her to state her opinion and she was honest with you. You don’t have to agree with her opinion/choices same as she doesn’t have to agree with your opinion/choices. She is probably very religious and therefore wouldn’t lie (as it is a sin) and is opposed to homosexuality (again because she believes it is a sin). I agree that she didn’t have to expand on it.

At the end of the day she was honest- who knows what your other vendors think and whether they just told you what you wanted to hear in order to book business. It is horrible that you had to go through with it but again at least she was upfront. It is the behind doors homophobes that you have to worry about!

Post # 52
Member
1812 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I am so sorry that we still live in a world where you even have to ASK if a supplier has a problem with whom you have chosen to marry.  I am sending the florist evil glares as we speak YellYell.

Keep on looking for a florist, and find someone who is genuinely happy to be able to be a part of your special day and would shout from the rooftops that they made your flower arrangements.

As for Fifi Flower’s opinions, don’t let her spoil your wedding day or the fun you should be having arranging it.  Look at those people who surround you, and love you and your Fiance and support your marriage.  Look at how happy they are to be a part of your wedding day, and look at those people who will support you and your wife as you begin married life.  Then look at you Fiance, and remind yourself that she is the woman that you are getting to spend the rest of your life with.  Not many people, gay or straight are as lucky as you to have so much love in your life.

Post # 53
Member
3580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA So this POS vendor will take your money as long as nobody sees her?  Is that what I am reading?  YELP the sh*t out of her, and then….

There are so many other florists.  And you’re a perfectionist so you could always learn to do your own flowers. And you should blast the WACK out of her on any forum you can.  The nerve.

Your instincts are correct.  Only give your money to those you think are supportive of your lifestyle.  I hate that word.  Anyway, there are so many other businesses that would be happy to flaunt you on their portfolio.  Find one.  And then send that *%& a link and hope that one day she gets with the program. 

Post # 54
Member
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

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@SweetChick  Of course you didn’t mention you’re marrying a man. You don’t have to because it’s considered the social norm. What if OP hadn’t asked about this and then the florist found out some other way and decided on the day not to deliver the flowers? For SS couples (like my sister and her partner), they DO have to make a point of asking because there are so many bigots out there who for somer eason don’t understand what “love” is.

Post # 55
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I feel bad for everyone involved. I feel bad for her that something like this is so terrifying to her that it stops her from doing her job. I feel bad that you and your Fiance have to suffer because of something that should be celebrated, not feared. You deserve a florist who will be excited to add to your wedding day. Best of luck! 

Post # 56
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Yelp that for sure! I’m marrying a guy but we do not tolerate bigots and would not want to patronize any business run by one. I’m sure other brides in your area, gay and straight alike, will want to know about this florist’s “issue.”

Post # 57
Member
2582 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@SweetChick  Of course you don’t have to mention it – you’re straight.   When you run the risk of people finding out later – maybe after its too late to find a replacement – and refusing to provide whatever service they normally provide, its VERY important to ask.

Post # 58
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

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@mandypop  I disagree, but there we are, it seems I’m not the only one. I don’tcheck that my hairdressers an atheist before I get my hair cut. 

 

Post # 59
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

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@photogestelle  I think there are very few social ‘norms’ today. Society is different. How on earth would she have known i was straight?

I think the poster was unlucky. There are probably very few people with such views and of those, she picked one. 

My florist was paid after she hada carried out her job, not before, incase there were issues.

Im not being mean here, it just seems to me there could be a whole list of lifestyles that you could run through with each business, before giving them said business. 

The bottom line is, she’s a florist, she arranges flowers. She isn’t paid it give advice or opinions not related to her specialism, and shouldn’t be involved in such issues as that is totally NONE of her business. 

 

Post # 60
Member
1114 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

That’s disgusting.  But at least you knew before you had put down any deposits and you can take your business elsewhere.  I’m sorry you had been excited by her proposals before then, but you’ll find another florist who isn’t a neanderthal and will 100% support you and your wife on your big day, just as you deserve.  *hugs*!

Post # 61
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I agree with the PP’s. Blast her company on every source that you can. I’d bet that there are plenty of couples (both gay and straight) out there who would be interested in knowing this. As a straight woman, I would never book with a vendor who shared such closed minded opinions. 

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