(Closed) Honestly, How would you feel if your ring was NOT what you wanted.

posted 5 years ago in Rings
  • poll: How would you feel/react towards the ring? Choose 2.
    1. Disappointed : (161 votes)
    32 %
    2. Happy : (34 votes)
    7 %
    3. Pissed : (19 votes)
    4 %
    A. Suck it up and learn to love it : (135 votes)
    27 %
    B. Keep it in the box for the rest of forever : (12 votes)
    2 %
    C. Exchange/upgrade without his knowledge : (2 votes)
    0 %
    D. "Lose" it and ask for a new one : (11 votes)
    2 %
    E. I'm just glad I got a ring, even though it's my least favorite : (69 votes)
    14 %
    F. Tell him he made a bad choice and you don't like it : (63 votes)
    12 %
  • Post # 3
    163 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    @HonoraryNerd:  I would probably be over the moon for about a month then try and figure out a way to get it changed. If Fiance was a gajillionaire I would probably lose it…

    I know I’m going to sound like a biatch but Fiance and I discussed my ring, and we had it planned before we got engaged. If he had gone off and bought something to the opposite of what I had said I would really appreciate his thought, but end up asking for a different ring. 

    Post # 5
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    That was exactly my situation (except without the getting on one knee, declaration of undying love, etc.). I got a yellow sapphire (with a diamond on either side) set in yellow gold. Yellow is…not a favourite colour of mine. So when he proudly told me it was a sapphire, I smiled and nodded and, in the back of my mind, though “Sapphires come in just about every colour! Why yellow??”

    Anyway, after wearing it for a few months, I started to like it – the way the light sparkles in the diamonds is beautiful, and the different colours in the sapphire are fantastic! It goes from pale yellow to dark brown, depending on the lighting. But it took me a while to warm to it, I’ll admit.

    Post # 6
    199 posts
    Blushing bee

    i would be pissed, because he did not listen to me.

    Post # 7
    20 posts
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @HonoraryNerd:  For me, it’s not about the ring. Don’t get me wrong, I told him what I wanted and he more than surpassed my expectations, but even if it was the complete opposite of what I wanted, it’s just the fact that he took time and effort into picking out what he thought was the perfect ring for me and no one else. That’s all that really matters.

    Post # 8
    2076 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

    .25 ct solitaire is nice! I wouldn’t think that’s too flashy. (My centre stone of my e-ring is .27, which I picked myself as Fiance was going to spend a bit too much than I would’ve liked him to.)

    But hypothetically speaking, if Fiance did pick something I really, really, didn’t like: I wouldn’t ruin the moment. I would’ve said “Yes”, as he is the person I am interested in; not the ring. My compromise for not upgrading the hypothetical ring is that I’d get to choose the wedding band.

    Even if money was no option, I wouldn’t want my Fiance to spend $$$ on a rock on some ring, unless he had gotten it at wholesale price. Hey, but that’s just me, personally. I’d rather invest the same $$$ on an investment property or invest in education than a fancy ring.

    Post # 10
    4656 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    The only way I wouldn’t love it is if he just got the first thing he saw and didn’t think about it. If he got something he put thought and care into, I’d learn to love it no matter what it looked like because it was what he chose for me.

    Post # 11
    427 posts
    Helper bee

    Honestly, if he picked it out himself because he saw it and immediately thought it was “me”, I would be stoked! I want something that he instantly associates with me, even if it happens to be totally opposite of what I told him I wanted. The biggest thing for me, is that he puts his heart into choosing it and he does his best to find something he truly wants me to have. Of course we all have certain stones, metals and sizes we prefer. But knowing someone went out and just HAD to get something different because it was so “you” is a pretty cool thing if you ask me πŸ™‚

    Post # 13
    2076 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

    @HonoraryNerd:  None taken at all! I’ve always preferred simple/understated, sweet and small jewellery. πŸ™‚ (I’ve had a few people pick my hand up and go, “oh.. it’s quite small”, but it doesn’t bother me at all!) (You can find the picture of it here: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/wedding-band-suggestions-help#axzz2TLM2NPfu)

    In this hypothetical question, I think it’s really sweet and romantic that the guy went down on one knee. My Fiance made me sit down…. I really didn’t want to sit down! I wanted to keep hiking in the mountains!

    The jeweller told us we could always upgrade later on by adding another 1k, but I doubt we ever would. I guess I just refuse to let commercials or anything/anyone make me feel inadequate and unhappy. πŸ™‚

    Post # 15
    25 posts

    Hi Ladies,

    This is a great topic, but I think it’s maybe helpful to look at this from another direction. Your choice in a spouse isnt luck, it’s not something you let someone else decide for you, and it’s certainly not worth settling for something that sort of makes you happy. Well, for me at least the ring was the same thing. I told the FH I wanted to have a say in the jewelry when the time came. Turns out he spent way less and was way more comfortable letting me research, design, and order the ring for myself. Romantic? No. Empowered? YES. Do I have a ring that makes me just as thrilled as my FH could ever dream of? YES. πŸ™‚

    Obviously one size doesn’t fit all, and I applaud all the bees who have found less hands on ways to get engaged!!! Just thought I’d share my story, since sometimes a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do….

    Post # 16
    621 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I would say something and have it exchanged because my Darling Husband has bad taste in jewelry lol… i picked my own ring

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