(Closed) Honeyfund

posted 7 years ago in Honeymoons
Post # 17
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@hemoncdr:  i think your response is tacky!  Tacky tacky tacky!

 

she already stated she’s doing it and she’s excited about it.  She was asking for advice from those WHO HAVE DONE IT.

 

Post # 18
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@hummingbirdkrista:  although we didnt use honeyfund, we had a honeymoon registry through our travel agent and it went over really well.  They didnt take any fees and all the money went into our credit with them only to be used towards the honeymoon.   

Ignore the nay Sayers, it’s a great idea and if you’re excited about it, do it!

Post # 19
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Just my two cents…if I’m putting my “guest hat” on I’d much prefer to give the couple cash or a check the old fashioned way in a greeting card than have a percentage of my money be diverted to the website for a trip or activity they may or may not spend it on.  I’d want the couple to get 100% of my cash.  That’s why I don’t think it’s a good idea.  Also, I wish it was set up in a way where what I think I’m buying for the couple is actually being bought.  So, the money could go right to the resort for a spa treatment or whatever.  It’s just a bit of a sneaky feeling to me because if I want to give you cash to spend as you please then I’ll do that.  But if I want to buy one of your hotel nights then I want the hotel to get the money and I should be able to trust that’s where it’s going.  It should be truly my decision or don’t tell me that’s what it is if it isn’t.

Post # 20
Member
2701 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@cml:  Actually, there is a HUGE difference between asking for cash and having a registry.  A registry is a guideline/wish list that helps guests figure out what the couple needs and the couple’s style.  It’s a way to prevent the couple from getting a 5 toasters and 3 blenders and get matching china.  With a registry, there are lots of options at varying price points for the guest to choose from.  The guest also has the option to go off-registry should they choose (for instance, a guest might see you registered for some pots and pans and opt to buy you a full set, ones of better quality, a similar pan that the guest owns and loves, etc.).  When you ask for cash, you dictate the gift given.  There are no options for guests to choose from.  You cannot register for different types of cash. Plus, everyone knows cash is appreciated.  Your guests aren’t stupid.  If you have a small registry or say you are saving up for your honeymoon, they will get the hint and give you cash!

Requesting cash can also make the couple look greedy.  It gives them impression that the couple has everything they need, but still want stuff so just fork over some cash and they’ll figure out what to do with it later.

Also, money can be a very touchy subject and some people are simply not comfortable giving cash.  They do not like the receiver knowing how much they spent.  With physical registries, one can use coupons, shop sales, compare prices at other stores, use gift cards, etc.  So when one requests cash, you can easily put some guests in an awkward position – and you don’t want to do that!

Finally, I strongly discourage Honeymoon registries because they are deceiving.  Guests think that they are buying you a romantic dinner or spa day or lagoon tour, but really, the couple just gets the cash (usually minus a fee).  I seriously do not see the point of Honeymoon registries at all.

 

I’ll get off my soap box now.  But one last thought, just because people haven’t told you it’s a bad idea or your friends said they didn’t complaints, doesn’t mean people are actually ok with it.  They won’t say anything to your face because they are being polite.

Post # 21
Member
2701 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@RockStar33:  This is the way to do a Honeymoon registry.  Despite my post above, I’m all for giving experiences.  The big problem with the majority of Honeymoon registries is that you don’t actually get what guests buy for you AND a fee is taken.  So there’s seriously no point in creating one. NONE.

BUT, if you regsiter through a restort or travel agent where the you actually get a coupon/certificate for a romantic dinner or spa day or shark feeding tour or whatever, then that’s fine.  I would want to give you a shark feeding tour – that’s cool and fun.  I don’t want to pretend to give you a shark feeding tour and then you take the money and go get your nails done instead.  That’s not cool. =/

Post # 22
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@RunsWithBears:  I agree 1,000%.  I never ever give cash for a wedding gift. I refuse to do so.  So with these rude honeymoon registries what do the couple who “has everything they need” give guests like me as a option to purchase for them?  Nothing.  So the couple would just get a item of my choice, and no reciept. 

 

Post # 23
Member
2457 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I used Honeyfund for our wedding, and it worked out great. Our friends were excited to gift us with cash to go towards specific things for us to do in Ireland. None of them wanted to buy gifts (who wants to carry that to the wedding? We are in 2013, the only people who care about that are my older family members). Our guests were able to print out what they were giving the cash for and include it in the card. They left fun messages for everything, and we were able to tag them in those locations later on. 

Don’t listen to the haters – if HF works for you, do it. 🙂

EDIT: Honeyfund does NOT take cash from your guests (at least, they didn’t when we got married last year). Your guests choose what they like, claim it as their gift to give, print out the paper which says what they’re gifting, and then they give that and the $$ for it to YOU DIRECTLY in a card at the wedding (or however else they want to give it to you). Honeyfund doesn’t exchange money. 

 

 

 

Post # 24
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

We’re using Honeyfund for our wedding registry, and we’re getting really positive feedback from our guests (even our very traditional relatives). We paid for the upgraded option (which I think does a lot for the look of the registry) and I put a lot of time into writing the descriptions and sharing details about our honeymoon. Our plan is to take lots of photos during the honeymoon of us enjoying the gifts that our guests bought and including those photos in the thank you cards we send out. (i.e. “Dear Bob, Thank you for buying us that lovely dinner on the beach. We had an amazing time. Here’s a photo of us enjoying our meals!”)

If you’d like to peek at how our registry turned out, just message me. 🙂

Post # 25
Member
3723 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@hummingbirdkrista:  I was actually looking forward to hearing feedback on using a honeyfund and if people had good experiences – not the etiquette wet blankets poo-pooing something they haven’t done themselves!

Post # 26
Member
13943 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I personally do not like the honeyfund idea, and they are not acceptable in my social circle.  My family and friends would be offended if I blatantly asked for cash, which is what a honeyfund is doing.  If it’s acceptable in yours, go for it!

Post # 27
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the honeymoon fund thing a jar you leave out at the wedding?  To me, the reason its tacky is because the guest will more than likely bring you a gift from your registery, and THEN they are expected to throw in some money to your honeymoon jar on top of it.  Don’t forget the present they bought you for your bridal shower, too!  That is where it gets tacky in my opinion.  

However, if you don’t register and you let guests know in advance about the honeymoon fund (via website?) then it may be okay.  But yes, “cash” gifts can sometimes be viewed as more tacky than a registery.  I think it has to do with a physical gift vs. cash.

Post # 28
Member
9680 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@hummingbirdkrista:  I personally think honeyfunds are in poor taste, but I understand they are common in the UK. I’ve never seen them in Canada, and I would not attend a wedding where the couple explicitly asked me for money.

 

Post # 29
Member
13943 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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@al0818:  She’s talking about the website registry, not the jar left out at the reception (which is definitely inappropriate!)

Post # 30
Member
363 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I am also planning to have my honeymoon in Kauai and my fiance and I are thinking about signing up for a honeymoon fund. In our culture (Asian culture), we typically give cash as a wedding gift anyway so I don’t see it as being offensive to our guests. I honestly think most of them will just give us cold cash/write a check instead of going onto the honeymoon fund website.

Post # 31
Member
29 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think the putting a jar out at the reception is stepping over the line. Your guests will have already brought a gift.

If you can place a link to your honeymoon registry on your website and maybe have your family spread the word verbally, that’s the best way to handle it. Some people will still bring a gift or cash instead, but hey, it’s a gift.

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