(Closed) Honeyfund etiquette?

posted 8 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: What would you consider putting on a Honeyfund?
    Venue fees : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Reception fees (food, etc.) : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Attire for bride and groom, wedding rings : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Honeymoon : (71 votes)
    45 %
    Home improvement stuff : (27 votes)
    17 %
    Trips : (21 votes)
    13 %
    Assorted fun stuff : (20 votes)
    13 %
    Other : (10 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    484 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Wow really?!?! the wedding?? Im not sure Id have the guts to do that…my cousins asked for home depot cards etc to help remodel their home though…

    Post # 5
    18637 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I really think asking people to pay off your wedding is crossing the line.  People shouldn’t have a wedding that they can’t afford to pay for on their own.

    Post # 6
    5095 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Well, I’m probably an extreme example, because we’re not even having any kind of registry. And not because we don’t need anything, either, ha! My sweetie is ADAMANTLY opposed to registering, because he doesn’t think it’s right to (his words) “dictate what people give.” I don’t really see it that way, but it’s one of the few wedding-related things that he feels super strongly about, and since Miss Manners actually agrees with HIM, I’m going along with it.

    That said, I really dislike it when people ask for monetary contributions.  It’s not totally rational, I guess, but I was raised to see that as extremely tacky, like you’re using this important, meaningful day as a fundraiser. 

    Post # 8
    10287 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think the only acceptable thing to register for other than the normal home goods is the honeymoon. Asking guests to help pay for their wedding is incredibly tacky. We considered doing a honeymoon registry since we’ve had our own home for over 4 years but in the end we decided to just upgrade some of the things we already had.

    Post # 10
    1893 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    Wow, that’s nuts.  We’re doing a honeymoon registry because we are in the process of trying to get rid of a bunch of household stuff we have (we combined households last year so we have two of everything!), so the very last thing we want or need is more house stuff!!  We’ll register for a few small items for anyone who doesn’t feel comfortable with the honeymoon registry thing, but that’s it. 

    I couldn’t possibly imagine asking people to pay for the actual wedding though.  Kind of defeats the purpose of HOSTING a reception, no?

    Post # 12
    4162 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think it’s perfectly acceptable to set up a registry for your honeymoon, especially in our case when all of our friends and family know we travel so much.  It’s not that we can’t afford our honeymoon, in fact we’re going on 3, it’s just that we don’t really need any household items (except I want a dyson vac, but I don’t think someone would buy it for me, too expensive!) since we’ve been living together for 4 years already.  But to pay for your wedding…I think it’s totally cheesy to ask for help from friends and family to pay for your wedding.

    Post # 13
    722 posts
    Busy bee

    I don’t like honeymoon registries, so my choice would be none. It is no different than asking for cash. Just because it is supposedly for a couples massage or dinner for two, you are still just giving the couple a check.

    Post # 14
    541 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    We are doing a Honeyfund. We aren’t putting anything on there having to do with the wedding. To me, that seems weird. We are only putting items for the honeymoon and help with the down payment of a house. We also have a separate registry in case people don’t like the idea of the Honeyfund.

    Post # 15
    166 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    We are doing a HoneyFund and a traditional registry.  We are just registered on the HoneyFund for ‘perks’, like a nice dinner or a massage; a bottle of wine or a sea side dessert.  The only place we have it listed is on our wedding website, we aren’t really telling people about it.  If you can’t afford a wedding, don’t have one!!  And don’t expect other people to foot the bill………totally classless.

    Post # 16
    171 posts
    Blushing bee

    You can use the Honeyfund money for anything-but don’t tell your guests! Let guests use Honeyfund to buy you fun things, keep the budget cringing on WB. 

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