(Closed) Honoring deceased loved one, ideas.. Opinions please

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2441 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m doing charms on my bouquet with my father’s pictures. 

I am also considering walking with some free flowers , in my bouquet that I can pull out and give to people. Like my grandma for my grandfather that passed, my mom for my father that passed. Etc. Etc. As a way to honor their memory. We still aren’t 100% on it but we like that idea so far. 

Post # 3
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Hello, I think a dove release would be a beautiful way to honor your grandfather.

For what its worth I’ve lost my sister and my Fiance has lost his mother.  After the ceremony we are going outside to do a balloon release. There will be balloons in each of their favorite colors and my side will take the color representng my sister, and his side will take the ones for his mom. We are also doing a bouqet at the ceremony and a table with memorial candles at the reception. 

Its hard to find a good balance between remembering them and turning it into a memorial, but I just can’t imagine not involving the two people we will miss more than anything that day.

Post # 4
Member
5364 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’ve lost both of my parents and my pawpaw raised me as well. He passed away the day after we got engaged, before I could get home and tell him. However, I had bought my dress months before and he got to see me in it and we had pictures made. FI’s grandpa passed away 2 months and 2 days later. Me and him also had pics done in my dress. Both of those pics will be on display, along with my parents wedding pic and a pic of FI’s mom (she’s also passed.) I might also have charms on my bouquet. I can’t really sew anything on my dress because it’s mesh so you would be able to see it, but I love the idea. 

We also will kinda include them in other ways. My parents honeymooned in Hawaii which is where we got engaged and will be getting married so it’s almost like they are there with us. My FI’s mom’s favorite thing was seashells so I will have a seashell bouquet, I also want to try and include blue hydrangeas since that was my mom’s favorite flower. Plus my engagement ring has diamonds from both of their wedding sets, so they are always with me. 

Post # 5
Member
209 posts
Helper bee

I’ve been at weddings where the officiant takes a moment to mention those loved ones who couldn’t be at the wedding because they’ve passed away. Maybe your officiant would have an idea of someting nice to say? Maybe something about the support of those people who nurtured you and helped you become the person you are today and how they’re smiling down on you on this joyous occasion. 

Post # 7
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016 - Boettcher Mansion

I’m facing this, too, my dad passed away a little over 3 years ago and I’m not sure what is going too far versus something that is nice and will bring back good memories… So far I’ve found a poem and I’ve heard people will leave a seat empty and put a rose on it for the person who would’ve occupied it… But I wasn’t sure if that would be a nice thing to do or would be too much for my mom. :-/ It’s tricky! Another idea I liked was taking the bridal bouquet after the ceremony (the next day, if necessary) and putting it on the loved one’s grave. I think that’s something I’d like to do for my dad, it’s personal and private yet meaningful… It’s definitely a tricky balance!

Post # 8
Hostess
11050 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

View original reply
kimber215: I think a Dove release sounds a beautiful idea. I like what I’ve seen others do here on WB and as a PP suggested – having picture charms tied onto or bouquet. 

Post # 10
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

I am in favor of as many remembrances of the people who are gone as you want to do.

BUT, not for everyone at the wedding to be aware of. One (if that) general announcement “for those who have passed on” tribute, then that’s it. Go ahead and play their favorite songs, serve foods, wear jewelry, have flowers, but don’t announce every time, “this is in memory of my grandad/mother/sister”. It is for you and the people at the wedding who remember the deceased.

 

Post # 11
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I had a framed 8X10 picture of my dad at the reception. People loved “seeing him” there, and it was a great comfort to me.

Post # 12
Member
8938 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
kimber215:  We attended a beautiful wedding that included a dove release. Not sure if they’d been cooped up in the basket too long or what, but 6 people that we know of got shit on, including my husband. It was less beautfiul after that.

Post # 13
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee

I lost my brother in 2000 in a tragic car accident. When Darling Husband and I got married in 2002 we didn’t want it to be like another memorial service. So in order to honor my brother we chose the closest Saturday to his birthday July 27th (his birthday was the 30th), I wore his cologne – Clinique Happy for Men (which is what I wear to this day. Slightly spicy scent – I don’t like floral perfume), I put Rosemary Sprigs from my Mom’s garden (where we got married) for rememberence, and on his birthday I made my bouquet flowers into a wreath and placed them in the lake at my parents’ house.

Post # 14
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2014

View original reply
kimber215:  For my grandma, I did a charm photo frame on my bouqet and next to my card box, I had a 8×10 pic of her in a beautiful frame with a lit candle next to her with a message in another nice 4×6 frame saying “Though absent, you are always near…still missed, loved, and very dear.

Post # 15
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee

We’re doing this two ways. We were both really close with our grandparents. I only have one grandma left and he has one grandfather left and sadly, neither of them can even attend because theyre both too sick. Im making frames of each set of gradparents on their wedding day and hanging them on the first two aisle chairs on each side so it’s like “they’re with us” sitting in the ceremony. Even though many people won’t necessarily see them, I know my immediate family will really appreciate this and I will know they’re there. We are also taking some time in our ceremomy for a “rememberance and acknowledgment” where our officiant is going to name our granparents who have passed and acknowledge the two that could not be in attendance. 

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