Post # 1
I just found this website but have gotten so many ideas already from all of you!! I wanted to reach out to you guys to get your thoughts on some ways that we can honor our relatives who have passed away, but in a very tasteful and discrete way. By discrete I just mean, not a huge hype, but simple and not depressing at the same time. My fiances parents both passed away young, and I would also like to do something for my mothers parents (my grandparents) who were very important to me, and have both passed as well. My fiance is a little sensative to this and thinks it may be depressing if not done the right way, while I have always wanted to have something honoring my grandparents at my wedding. My thoughts were to simply have our florist do several thin vases (the cylinder shaped ones) with water, an orchid sunken in it, with a floating candle for each person and maybe put a few pictures around them on a small table. I was thinking of possibly finding a sweet poem to frame and place on the table as well. I thought this might be something that you may even not notice unless you were looking at all of the details, but that would still honor those who have passed.
So my question really is, what are your thoughts? Do you think that is simple and understated enough while still honoring them? Did you have a suggestion of something you had heard, saw or had done that you really liked?
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, for any imput you ladies share!!!
Post # 3
You can put something small in the program. You can get one of those memorial candles. Maybe if you have a prayer at your reception you can say something about those who aren’t with you.
Post # 4
Here’s a picture of the candle.
Post # 5
My husband’s father has passed away, and we put his parents’ and my parents’ wedding pictures on display.
Post # 6
We did a photomontage and had the pictures titled “In Loving Memory” played first so that the funnier younger pictures would then create happiness 🙂 The phrase on the montage said “When someone you love becomes a Memory; The memory becomes a Treasure” It was a great quote. Maybe it would work for your table idea.
Post # 7
We’re doing a unity candle ceremony but integrating our ancestor candles into it. We’re both having a candle made honoring the ancestors from our own individual families. We’re lighting our individual tapers off of our ancestor candles, then lighting our unity candle with that. 🙂
Post # 8
I wanted to do something with a poem and add it to the program. But I am having a hard time trying to figure this out. I love the candle idea. I also thought about maybe a table too?
Post # 9
i think that is a great idea – though all my grandparents have passed he still has all of them around -i still wanted to do something special for mine so on a table -maybe my cake table or gift table im going to have 6 pictures – i have some beautiful wedding pictures of my grandparents on both sides and a picture of my parents on their wedding day – i put them all in cute little frames and plan to put them on easles on the table. im hoping FMIL can find pictures like these from their side too.
Post # 10
I usually stick to the waiting boards, but forgive me just this once for butting in, lol.
We, too have passed relatives that I would want to honor at our (hopefully one day soon) wedding, and I remember seeing on here once about a rosemary plant/tree being used. It’s apparently associated with rememberance to honor those that have passed, as well as to never forget your vows, so it’s a common thing to see at both weddings and funerals alike. Maybe you could put pictures of the relatives you wish to honor around a potted rosemary plant? Add a touching poem or candle? Just some thoughts.
Post # 11
All we did was have two bouquets made (3 white roses with greens) and placed them on the seats where they would have been sitting. One, for my Mom, was next to my Dad, and the groom’s Grandfather’s was next to his Gram.
Post # 12
My husband’s parents have both passed away. I put a tiny picture of his parents in his boutonnière. He also carried two roses up the aisle with him and we left 2 empty chairs in the front row. We decorated the chairs with a floral arrangement and he laid the roses in the chair. We had pictures of them on display at the reception and also had a poem in the program. It was something along these lines:
In Loving Memory of Mr & Mrs XXXXX
Although we can’t see you
we know you are here
Smiling down, watching over us
As we say “I Do”
Forever in our hearts,
Forever in our lives.
And so we say our vows
In loving memory of you.
I hope this helps!
Post # 13
@Querida: OMG! That is so sweet. I started to tear up just thinking about it. Very classy and I loved how you made the remembrance a quick part of the ceremony. Thank you for sharing. We will definitely be using this idea.
Post # 14
We found old pics of all the grandparents and great grandparents, had them printed in sepia tone and made a photo board that was displayed on the table with the placecards and seating chart.
Post # 15
@GardenBride: I’m glad the ideas were helpful! I should also mention that at the time my parents were being seated (well after, really), one of my husband’s nephews carried the floral arrangement for the chair up the aisle. I think it really helped my husband feel his parents presence with him that day and he later told me that he was completely touched that I wanted to incorporate them into the wedding.
Post # 16
I chose to do something a little different. I had one white rose in my bouquet for every grandparent we had lost (thankfully, those were the only ones we needed to commemorate!) and had the priest explain that the white roses were honoring our grandparents. It was like I was carrying them with me as we got married. I just wish I had made sure the priest would remember since he kind of forgot day-of, but those who really needed to know knew.