- 4 years ago
I proposed to my fiancee about five months ago. Her mother essentially forced her to choose between me or her and took away everything she had. Her siblings followed suit. I’m not a bad guy….I just have depression and her mother and family cannot understand that. I am college educated, have a great career, own my own house and car and have money in the bank . And I’m a pretty nice guy.
Recently, her mother wanted to make amends. I didn’t want to go, but I went for my fiancee’s sake. We all met at a mutual spot and both my fiancee and I agreed beforhand that if things got rough, we would leave together. Well, it didn’t go well: her mom entered a tirade and said just how much she didn’t like me. At one point, I told my fiancee I was leaving because her mother was not making me feel well. I went towards the car, but my fiancee grabbed my arm and made me go back to where her mother continued to speak negatively to me.
This upset me because it made me think that my fiancee could not respect my feelings and protect me as I would do to her. We are in this situation because while we were dating, my fiancee would tell her mother many intimate things about us. So I am working on trusting her again, but incidents like this don’t help strengthen that trust.
We are supposed to visit her brother and sister in law this weekend as well. They have not been in the picture because they, too, do not support our engagement and have voiced that concern. Because I thought visiting them might hurt me like the meeting with their mother, I declined the invitation. Instantly, I was bombared by texts that said I was not compassionate, that I did not value family, and that I was full of bitterness. So I wrote back and decided to go and see them but i don’t.
my question: how many times do i let my fiancee place me in situations that are not good? i know she had no idea about how her mom would respond, but it bothered me that she continued to bring me back there. I want a wife who will not put our relationship in harm’s way.
What would you do? This awful family is tearing us apart and I am so tired of this. You almost have to have superhuman strength to continue in this relationship due to the horrible family.