- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
Hi Bees. I am a newbee but have liked what I have seen so far on this site in the way of the great support people receive from others. And this evening, I need some support and not sure where to turn to. Here is what happened:
Fi and I had both agreed that for this long 4 day weekend off work for Thanksgiving, we would have his brother, brothers wife, and three kids (all under the age of 3), who live out of town, stay with us in our house for the first time. They were supposed to be here at 9am Thanksgiving morning but instead showed up at 1am Thurs. unannounced. I blew that off because I know they did not have a phone to warn us (they are very poor and cannot afford one). At 1am, I was at the 24 hour store picking up pajamas, baby wash, etc. becuase they did not bring anything with them for the kids. No big deal I thought, I was very understanding. To make a long story short, this long weekend I did not get to relax once for I was busy cleaning up after everybody, cooking, taking care of the kids etc. The family does not practice hygiene that none of them have taken a bath since Thursday (after we pretty much made them take a bath before they went to my family’s house for Thanksgiving) so the kids were running around in dirty pajamas all day with snot running down their noses and wiping their snot on my furniture. Their mom would overlook all that and continue watching tv. Not to mention, I came down with a very bad flu in the middle of all this. After the third day, me and Fiance put new tires on their car as a gift and was going to send them on their way home, when his brother locked his keys in the car. Fiance turned to me and told me that they will have to stay another day until they get the door open. I freaked out at Fiance and said I can not do this anymore. I am tired, sick, they do not watch their kids, almost everything in our house is either broken or has snot on it, they need to go, TONIGHT! Fiance and I got in a huge fight and all the while he is just saying “I do not know why you are so mad. They are fine just hanging out in the house. You need to get some rest because you are sick”. I told him so many times that there is no way to get any sort of proper rest in this house because the minute I go into the bedroom, one of the kids knocks at my door or comes right in. I told their mom to watch them because I have to take a nap but she does not discipline her kids and would just say “no, no..come here…” then 5min later, I here them at the bedroom door knocking again.
As you can imagine, Fiance and I got in a huge fight. He thinks I am overracting. I told him I was mad because of how unappreciative he is being towards me. I guess I expected him to say “thank you, I really appreciate you giving 120% when you are very ill, to my family and showing them great hospitiality.” I have been very stressed out for the last 4 days, spent lots of money on food for everybody, I am very sick, and my house needs to be cleaned. Not to mention a long work week ahead of me tomorrow. I don’t think I am overracting. I guess the reason I am angry is because they don’t watch their kids, they don’t clean up after them (they had dirty faces and hands, floor was completely littered with food after they ate everytime), none of them bathe (after telling her 10 times that I had fresh towels and bought shampoo for them waiting in the bathroom), many things in our house is broken, my house is a wreck, I feel bad for those poor kids because both his brother and wife are not the smartest people (I mean they had rap music up so loud in their car while their kids were in the back seat, I told them to turn it down before their kids went deaf!!) and now Fiance is not speaking to me because I am just being a “bitch”. He knows his brother is not the brightest but it is his family and he helps him out for the kids. I don’t know if I can marry this guy because I feel like I am marrying the family..eek. I feel sick thinking about it :(.