- 4 years ago
Wow, that’s awkward.
Wow, that’s awkward.
If she wasn’t planning on paying for your shower, that should probably have been made clear from the beginning when she offered to host it.
ETA: Hell, I’d cancel it even if it was tomorrow. Tell the invitees to donate any gifts to a women’s shelter.
Please tell us this chick will also “make you” a cake for this shower that you’re paying for, 🍰🎂 because she’s right up there with the caking lady who charged her friend for her gift.
I can cover the cost without cutting my personal or wedding budget short. I just feel funny about having her stand up and run the show like she provided a beautiful shower for me when she’s not hosting it in the truest sense of the word. I’m glad I’m not the only one that thought this was a little unusual!
Since she already purchased her plane tickets, I’d feel like scum if she wasted that much money. Lesson learned to be VERY clear when someone offers to do something for me from now on! Thanks bees
If it were me, I would tell her SHE needs to cancel the shower because it’s not in your budget nor did you realize when she offered to “host” she meant in name only.
So what if she already booked a ticket? She can reschedule her flight for whenever your wedding is for like a $100 change fee. You should NOT feel like “scum” because she bought airfare to attend a shower she duped you into paying for. SHE should feel like scum for treating a best friend like this.
Time to grow a backbone, bee.
I would tell her that it never occurred to me that as the guest of honor, I would be hosting the shower and that I don’t feel comfortable doing that. I would offer to keep the date, but tell her that the shower will now be held at ( your Mom’s house, aunt’s home, your home etc – anyone of the above).
I would ask her what her budget is for the shower and give her contact information for a few catering opions. Don’t book the catering yourself or she will leave you with the bill.
Remind her to notify the guests of the change of location.
Okay Maid/Matron of Honor I’ve been thinking.. It is so sweet of you to figure out all the details for the shower but I might not be able to swing it. I don’t expect you to pay for a whole shower but Honestly I’ve never known a bride to host her own shower and I just wasn’t expecting it.. I’m totally fine if no ones able to host it, I really don’t need one!
I’d be really mad and complain about it to everyone else…. This is actually crazy. Unless you REALLY want a shower I would not pay for it. (Also depends what the $ amount is..) Or see if someone with a nicer house/yard would let you do it at their house (or something like a coffee shop where you don’t get a whole menu) after you explain this debacle.
Don’t worry about her plane ticket she can refund it for credit and is actually insane to ask the bride to pay for her shower without discussing it first. People are crazy and you should do this to her when she has a baby. Good luck this sound super stressful/annoying!
Too bad about her plane tickets. It’s on her that she put you in this situation, not you. She can change the tickets or just come out for a visit. I would not get involved in the shower in any way, including reassigning it to other people, as that is equally inappropriate. I’d just tell her that you are uncomfortable paying for a self-celebrating party, the whole purpose of which is to solicit gifts, as that would be rude on your part.
I’d tell her you hadn’t planned on hosting your own bridal shower (because that’s what you’d be doing if you paid for this) and you’re not interested in doing so, and let her know she needs to call and cancel the event because you will not brew providing a head count or any money. The nerve of her to pretend to host a party in your honor but then stick you with the bill.
She can still take the trip out or change her ticket date, but I wouldn’t let her think what she did was okay.
The topic ‘Host not paying for shower’ is closed to new replies.