(Closed) Hosting shower – do I have to give a gift?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

This is one of those times where I wish brides would be more upfront with the people throwing the shower/bacholertte, etc.  Honestly, to me, she should have told you that throwing the shower was gift enough.  

I would not feel guilty for this.  I recently threw my sister a shower.  She didn’t expect a gift from me at all.  I doubt that the bride in this case does either.  You should be really pleased and proud that you were able to give her a wonderful party with all of her friends and family.  🙂

Post # 4
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Your gift was the shower. She should send you a thank you and acknowledge that.

Post # 5
Member
1046 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

All of the hostesses of my shower gave me a gift, but it wouldn’t have bothered me at all if they hadn’t (especially my cousin who did most of the work).

Post # 6
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

EDIT:  I should have also said that if you wanted to give a gift, that’s great and really nice…but you shouldn’t feel like you should or that you have to.

Post # 7
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

My shower hostess gave me a gift as well, but I don’t think there’s any expectation. 

Post # 8
Member
875 posts
Busy bee

I’ve hosted several showers and normally give them gifts as well, but if you didn’t because of lack of funds or time… in the case of something hand crafted don’t worry about it.  For my cousin’s wedding, I took about 6 months to finish her wedding sampler.  The frame was my Christmas present and the cross stitched sampler was her wedding gift.  (It took hours and hours and hours of work… and the frame wasn’t a cheap one!  

Post # 10
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

My mom hosted our engagement party and didn’t give a gift. She spent a ton and worked really hard on it making it special and personal to us, so I didn’t expect a gift. I always give a little gift if I’m hosting, but nothing huge.

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