Post # 1
So I’ve been doing some research online and the majority of experts/ brides/MOB/ SIL etc. think its not appropriate for the couple to throw their own party I believe it has to do something with the receiving of presents. My FI’s father and stepmother have mentioned to him that they would throw one but we wamt to throw our own. Something very intimate and casual in our new apartment, almost like an engagement party/ housewarming party. Now regarding presents: could care less. Honestly. We have everything we need or want so I don’t see the harm in hosting it. What are your thoughts on couples hosting their own party:?</
Post # 3
To me it just seems like asking for gifts. I’d think it was weird if a couple hosted an engagement party for themselves. You could still have one at your apartment, but I’d at least have my parents or his parents “host” it and provide food/drinks and be listed as hosts on the invitation.
That’s just me though… every social circle is different, so if it’s common for couples in your friends/family to do that then I think it’s fine!
ETA: even if you don’t want or care about presents, I think most people will assume they should bring a gift to an engagement party…
Post # 4
If you’re worried, I’d just title it a housewarming party on the invite and send them to all the same people you’d want at the engagement party! I don’t see why it would be bad to host your own engagement party… I don’t even think we are having one unless we plan it ourselves 🙁 Nobody has brought it up and we’ve been engaged over a year. I definitely feel that it’s ok for you to take the reigns and plan your own party!
Post # 5
Hosting your own pre-wedding parties is usually considered very tacky and comes off as gift grabby – even if you don’t want gifts. What was wrong with your FIs hosting a party? Or, why not just have a normal party at your house? No need to tack on the engagement part.
Post # 6
I think it’s perfectly okay to host your own engagement party! You want to celebrate your happiness with your friends. Maybe it’s just because I was raised to not expect gifts from anybody for anything, but I don’t think it sounds “gift grabby” at all.
Personally I would just invite everybody over for a party and then at the beginning announce how happy you are that your friends have gathered to celebrate your engagement. Or, you could have it at a restaurant or a bar. While I wouldn’t feel obligated to bring a gift to a person’s non-gift party, I would feel even less obligated if it was a night out.