(Closed) How "bad" of a ring would your SO have to give you for…

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 47
1034 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My husband and I picked out my ring together, though he mostly picked it out. He has great taste! 

I really doubt he would pick out something I disliked THAT much if he chose it without my input. But if he did, I wouldn’t have had a problem saying that I’d like something different. If I’m going to wear it for the rest of my life, it’s reasonable that I should love it.

I didn’t want to even chance that situation, though. Too much potential for hurt feelings! So I think it’s the best situation to choose a ring together.

Post # 48
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

It wasn’t an issue for us since all I wanted was a simple solitaire. If he can’t do that right, I’d had to reconsider… 

Post # 49
1000 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

Honestly, I would keep almost anything, but there are somet things I just don’t like (rope bands, very wide bands).  Unless a stone had a HUGE flaw, I probably wouldn’t make an issue about it, but in the future (like 5 yrs) as for a ring upgrade to something else.

Post # 50
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I had a very particular vision for my engagement ring.  I told my soon to be Fiance that I wanted a low set six prong solitare in white gold with a 1/5 to 1/2 karat diamond.  I also told him the band needed to be around 2mm wide and plain and with no side stones.

I got pretty much everything I wanted.  He did surprise me with a black diamond, which I loved.  It also has four prongs and a less substantial basket than I wanted, but didn’t mention.  He told me it was that way because it “looked more astetically pleasing”.  That’s what I get for falling for someone with an art degree.

Post # 51
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I would have a difficult time asking for a new ring. At the same time, Fiance and I discused what rings I liked and it just so happened that he liked the same ones. I would have been unhappy if it wasn’t a diamond, had a thick band, was yellow gold, or was anything more than a delicate halo (i.e. not the double or triple halo’s). Who knows, maybe I would have learned to love it and not asked for a new one. I get pretty sentimental about things like that pretty quickly so I feel like it would have to be many things that I didn’t want, not just one or two.

Post # 52
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I wouldn’t have a hard time asking for a different ring. It was important to me to absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE my ring! I just can’t imagine wearing something every day I don’t absolutely love. I never wore rings before and it turns out Im pretty picky about rings. It needed to be a clear stone, white metal, round center, 6 prongs, not a solitaire, not a halo, not a three stone, the right thickness in the band, be able to have a matching wedding ring that was completely completely flush (and the list goes on). Fiance wanted me to love the ring, so we went shopping together to give him some options. We went to many, many jewelers, but eventually found “the ring!” I’m so glad we went shopping together! 

Post # 53
5622 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I find it super hard to believe that with the amount of bee’s on here who HATE cluster rings, that they wouldn’t want a new ring if their fi gave them one. But who knows?

I’m super super picky about what I wear, I hardly ever wear jewelry, so for me to wear a ring all the time is a big deal. Fi totally knows, understands, and accepts it [he’s always loved that I know exactly what I want]. His mother gave him a very small solitaire ring to propose with and then I picked out my own [within budget].

The ring we purchased is more of a “for now” ring and not a “forever ring”. I only spent what I felt we could afford, which at the time was not a whole lot. Since then he has switched jobs and is making double what he used to, and I have gotten a raise as well. We plan to upgrade it for our 1st anniversary [he feels the one I picked isn’t “good enough” for me].

Luckily I never had to deal with fi getting me a ring I disliked, but if I disliked it, he would want me to tell him.

Post # 54
7813 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I can honestly say the ring doesn’t matter to me. I feel if people spent less time focusing on the materialistic symbols of a marriage – the ring, the wedding – and more time focusing on the marriage itself, the divorce rate would be a lot lower. 

Choosing my life partner has nothing to do with a diamond. If I’m lucky enough to find that person – and I was – then a ring seems awfully trivial to worry about. Even without a ring or a wedding, I know I want to be with my partner forever. 

Post # 55
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

If he got me a diamond that wasn’t conflict free…nope. Not wearing something on my hand that some probably died over. 

Post # 56
2766 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@sheepandbear:  LOL, when I saw the bent nail comment in the OP, I was like, “hmmm I wonder if she has seen the Cartier Juste un Clou ring!”

Post # 57
528 posts
Busy bee

A rapper style pave diamond clusterfuck would have me asking for the receipt. Luckily, he knows this, as we were discussing a friend of his, and he mentioned that the friend bought the most terrible engagement ring he had ever seen even though all his friends were telling him no, and I piped up with “OH NO! Don’t tell me it was one of those horrible squares with tons of itty bitty diamonds on it!” And he burst out laughing, because that was exactly the ring his friend had bought.

Post # 58
26 posts
  • Wedding: June 2016

I actually showed the EXACT ring I wanted to him to get me for our engagement . We never decided on getting engaged it just came up a few times in conversation and one day I decided to show him the exact ring I wanted lol and he actually had a go at me for showing him one LOL. It was a tiffany classic replica from moissaniteco and he liked it but said he wouldn’t get it because I choose it. He wanted to choose one himself  , when I thought about it a bit more I did agree lol.

But I did tell him I wanted yellow gold and roughly what stone size I wanted , and 6 prongs. 


When the day came and he proposed I LOVED my ring and even more he choose the setting himself . It ment a lot more that it wasn’t a ring I picked and he just bought it and proposed to me.


I would of been annoyed if he had got me a diamond. I hate them for ethical reasons and really really didn’t want one. He kept asking me if it was money why I didn’t want and it wasn’t. I knew he could afford a diamond for me but I honestly just didn’t want one. I had my heart set on a moissanite since I found out about them. I’m not a fan of coloured gemstones on ME but I agree with some of the other ladies , they look good of different people and it really is done to personal taste. 

Post # 59
1000 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

@Kimberley25:  LOL anyone who says they’ll take anything might change their mind with that one!

Post # 60
1699 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 1997

@freshflowers:  any kind of manmade imitation/simulant/fake stone even in a “real” setting, or a ring in mystery metal would not work for me.  I would rather have an inexpensive real gemstone in silver than any “wannabe”.

Interesting question!. Hopefully by the time marriage is considered the couple know each other and their tastes pretty well! 🙂

Post # 61
2010 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@MrsPanda99:  + 1

It never occurred to me to send my DH off ring shopping on his own. For starters I didn’t want an engagement ring anyway but we bought my wedding ring together and on Friday we went out and bought my Christmas present – an eternity ring – together. He knows my taste (simplicity and a dislike for raised stones) and also that I couldn’t wear anything that cost as much as the deposit on a small house. Other than that, I’m easy going since the thought matters more to me than the specification. Also, what I know about diamonds and gemstones could be written on a postage stamp. 

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