- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
My cultural background is German on my mom’s side, and Irish on my dad’s side. My FH is pretty much 100% German (his dad was born in Germany). My parents are divorced (that becomes important later).
We are incorporating a lot of our German heritage into the wedding- complete with schnitzel as a dinner option and a Thursday night “Tracht encouraged” party at a German Beer Hall (tracht is traditional German clothing). But I was trying to figure out a way to incorporate my Irish side too. I am proud of that culture, and it’s also pretty obvious that I have that background (pale skin, a few freckles, and yes… I’m a ginger) so why not embrace it?
A few months ago my dad told us that something he would really like is for us to get a piper for the end of the ceremony- to lead us out of the church. (we are getting married in a large catholic cathedral) I actually LOVE that idea. It happened at the end of a wedding I went to a few years ago, and it was great! My dad has not been super involved in the wedding process. He’s leaving us alone, this was the only suggestion/request he made to us.
My mom, on the other hand, has been EXTREMELY involved. She and my step dad are generously paying for quite a bit (not all) of the wedding expenses, and she has used that as an excuse to pretty much take over. Her personality is dramatic and over sensitive, and I am an only child. This combination has made her a bit of a mom-zilla when it comes to the wedding. (but that is all a story for a different day- just take my word for it).
A few weeks ago, my dad tells us that he has found a piper. He talked to him about how it would work, and he even talked to our priest about it. He said it was still up to us- but he was SO excited about it. (and frankly, I’m excited about it too).
The piper told him that it usually works best if it is a complete surprise. And of course, I’m most worried about my mom. If I tell her beforehand, she will probably veto it and put up a big stink (not because she doesn’t like the idea, but because it was my dad’s idea). If I don’t tell her and let it be a surprise for her too, I risk some sort of melt town. Or we can just politely decline the piper, come up with some excuse, and avoid all of this drama all together.
So, as the title suggests, I am wondering if I go through with this, as a surprise, how badly will she freak out? On a scale from 1 to physically attacking my father in the church? (that’s a joke.. I hope…)
Am I not giving her enough credit? Or are my fears justified and I should just forget the whole thing?
(would love to hear from other brides with mom-zillas, if there are any out there).