(Closed) How can I ask my MOH to step down?

posted 11 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
611 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Wow…. I would just try to get ahold of her and when you do let her know that while you cherish your relationship you feel that do to the distance and her job situation you think it would be fair to take the Maid/Matron of Honor responsibilities off of her shoulders and onto one of your family member’s shoulders.  Tell her you don’t want to burden her with the expences, but still want her to stand with you. (If you still want her to stand wiht you) Tell her you just googled for the local bridal shows.  I would then just ask your FI’s friend to be your Maid/Matron of Honor.  Good luck! 

Post # 4
493 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I would seriously talk to her about it before you take the step of actually asking her to step down.  If you actually talk to her about how you wish she was more involved, and give her examples of things you would like her to help with, maybe she’ll step up to the plate.  Maybe she just doesn’t know what is expected of her and needs a little guidance.  I’m always hesitant to encourage people to ask other people to “step down” unless the situation is really severe.  I just don’t want you to become the bad guy by rescinding the invitation.  It’s likely that the friendship will suffer tremendously if you ask her to step down.  I’d really be surprised if she even ends up being in the wedding after that (I’ve seen it happen before).  I guess you have to decide if her friendship is something you want to keep or not.  But I find that being open and honest with people and letting them know what you expect from them is the best way to approach things.

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