(Closed) How can I politely tell them “no more goats?”

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
2639 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Maybe it’s worth doing a small (say 20-item) registry. I’ve been “keeping house” for 18 years, and you can always find items to upgrade/replace. If people check the registry, don’t see anything they like (or if everything’s fulfilled), I would think you’d end up with cash. Or travel gift cards, like fishbone suggested.

This post cracks me up- I was thinking at first it was some sort of dowry- “No, Uncle John, we’re good, they only wanted 20 goats.”

Post # 18
711 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@mrssrm:  “I suggest starting a tradition of toasting the goats and their descendants at every anniversary.” Bahaha

View original reply
@KatyElle:  I agree.

I give goats, waterbuffalo and bees all the time as gifts, especially when someone doesn’t dictate a preference or a need (except for wedding gifts on the day of, those are cold hard cash). I do it through Heifer Int’l and it really is the gift that keeps on giving. I think my next gift is going to be the camel though–I think those are new. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 19
2536 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I did not think you meant it literally when I read the title.  I laughed like crazy when I read the post though. 

You can’t really dictate what gifts people give you, but I am kind of surprised the other coworkers were on board with buying more goats so quickly.  If someone told me they bought a goat for someone as a wedding gift, I’d raise an eyebrow and think to myself “I’ll be writing them a check”.

Post # 20
20 posts

i’m sorry but this is probably the only thread on here that i’ve laughed out loud to…i guess i am a terrible person too…

sorry OP ^^;;

i have this problem where i laugh when bad things happen though, i can’t help it. i don’t know why.

ANYHOW..well, do you have any friends that you can have spread rumors for you? someone who you trust/love who during some gossipy session can say “ticatica and her Fiance have been really trying to fix up their house but it is costing more than they thought..i bet they would really appreciate some cash!” (hypothetical situation..i don’t know what you really need..but something like that) 

a small registry isn’t a bad idea. there is something out there called a “honeyfund” which you can post on your website so people can give you cash gifts online. i’ve seen a bunch of people use it. i dunno how i feel about it but it works!


Post # 24
2567 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You could ask that they make a Kiva.org micro-loan in your name. Kiva basically connects small-dollar lenders (some as low as $25 or $50) with people/communities in very poor areas. The recipient has a set repayment timeline (usually a year or so, but you can find shorter ones) and needs to show their plan for the money—- buy grain to start a mill, buy seedlings to start a farm, buy hens to start an egg farm, and so forth.

The Kiva default rate is very low— over 98% of loans are repaid— and the money does some amazing good works for people who very much need it.

While I’ve never had someone make a loan in my name, I’d imagine Kiva has something set up. This way, you can offer a non-cash gift idea, redirect the goat-buyers to something equally charitable, and when the loan is repaid, you get the money.

Post # 26
1221 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

A friend who had the same registry stance as you got married last summer and a lot of us donated in their name or did Kivu donations. She and her husband have a combined income doubling most of our households, ($300k+) so it seemed silly for us to give them cash when so many other people can use the funds. They were grateful for the way we chose to gift.

Post # 27
6586 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

This is an awesome post!

Post # 28
389 posts
Helper bee

Just think of more goats as an investment in a great story to tell the kids or over drinks with friends in the future. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 29
3949 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@ticatica:  You HAVE to mention the farmer in your toast!!!

We had a simliar problem.  We didn’t register anywhere and our families/friends asked me what to get and i said, we both owned homes so we don’t need anything for the house … and left it that but  everyone knew that we both owned homes, I just quit my job and moved to be with DH, and paying for the wedding ourselves… so they just gave money.

 Out of 40 couples we got one set of wine glasses, and one GC to dinner out, the rest was money. 

I think your goat problem will just be a co-worker thing …

Post # 30
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

This is the kind of thing i thought only happened to me …

Post # 31
417 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Best. Thread Title. Ever.

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