(Closed) How did former brides plan a wedding WITHOUT the internet!?

posted 7 years ago in Technology
Post # 3
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

That is a very good point, I guess its no wonder they had such big bridal planning folders and books and all the expensive bridal magazines. I for one didnt buy a single bridal mag, the internet was enough for me. Without the internet I would have been so limited in my ideas.

Post # 4
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Seriously???  Yellow pages, magazines & phone calls.  Wedding planners and whatever they’d seen on tv/movies & in real life.  Must have been rough without Pinterest!

Post # 5
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I’d love to see comments on this.  My sister got married in 1997 and now that I am planning my wedding she says the samething.  “how did I plan my wedding without the internet???”  

I’m thinking it was a lot of word of mouth referals and a lot of driving around to meet vendors. 

Post # 6
Member
283 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Haha, good question! Although I kinda envy them because I’m sure they saved tons of $$ without having the internet suck them in to various expensive trends!!

Post # 7
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Before I booked anyone, I used the internet for all kinds of vendor reviews.  People probably just had to rely on word of mouth and recommendations for that type of thing.  It would SUCK!  Good point and good post, Miss Tattoo!

Post # 8
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I hear ya. I don’t know how they did it without it being a huge time suck. Brave women! 🙂

Post # 9
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think the internet has actually helped me save alot of money, the cost of bridal magazines alone!! Plus the internet brought me lots of DIY ideas

Post # 11
Member
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Since I’m probably older than most of you <cough> I’ll tell you. Brides had limited choices. You went to your bridal boutique and you picked a dress that was there… the only comparison you had was to other shops in your area, unless you were amitious and travelled to NYC or another city.

For details like ring-bearer pillows etc? Often your bridal place supplied that, or a party supply store (and iParty etc weren’t around). think of going to Michael’s now and you see, what, three types of ringbearer pillows (if you are using a pillow, maybe you are using a dish or bowl now!) and that was it. You chose which one you wanted. Ta-da. Done.

In some ways, the very limited choices made it easier. You know how many hours I spent searching for vintage pieces or trim for my ringbearer pillows? But in the end I”m happy… b/c a lot of the weddings in the 80’s or 90’s ended up being cookie-cutter. The only difference was the choice of flowers and colors you chose.

It’s kind of a double-edged sword having all these choices now… but in the end, I’m happy I get to personalize my wedding down to buying ribbon from around the world, or finding ideas online.

Post # 12
Member
5761 posts
Bee Keeper

I’ll tell you how we did it. We visited a lot of places  in person and did a ton of driving around after scheduling a million appointments, tying up all our weekends.

 No one did tastings, so you’d rely on the recommendation of a caterer that somebody else used or if you were lucky, tasted their food at another wedding.

 When picking a band (that’s what we did in my day), they would give you a list of where they’d be performing so you could go and hear them before booking. Same with photographers…appts. to meet them and see their work.

Favors were simple, centerpieces pretty basic, and everyone used white linens. Cakes were white, you picked a topper (usually at the bakery,if you wanted one), and you borrowed the best cars from all your friends to transport everybody to the church and reception.

You took your BM’s with you to few places to try on dresses after deciding on a color,and the same for yourself…….find one in a bridal store or have one made.

The internet has been a blessing in SO many ways!

Post # 13
Member
2373 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

I planned our wedding in 2007-2008: Wedding stuff on the internet wasn’t anything like it is today. I can’t image planning before the internet.

Post # 14
Member
1696 posts
Bumble bee

We actually did have internet back in the ’90s, and in the ’80s we had a proto-internet through bulletin boards. There was not nearly as much information on it as there is now, but you could find common interest groups with a bit of networking.

Now, back in the fifties when my siblings were getting married, or in the sixties when my girlfriends were getting married, it really was a different world.

For one thing, nearly everyone belonged to a church. So you didn’t need to hunt around for a ceremony “venue” and officiant: you got married either at church, or at your parents’ home, and in either case it was performed by the pastor. Even atheists typically had the pastor of the closest religious relative, offered up with pleas to “at least don’t talk to him about it, for heaven’s sake!”.

For another thing, the “back to the kitchen” movement was at its peak, and most women were throwing all the energy that they would normally have thrown into their work, into their clubs, or the Ladies’ Auxiliary at their church, or into entertaining. Remember, it wasn’t the brides planning those weddings, it was their very experienced mothers. In urban centres, those mothers had caterers that they — or their club executive, or the ladies who ran the altar guild — had dealt with previously. In rural centres, most weddings were catered by the church ladies themselves. Hostesses didn’t need “tastings” because they had already tested out which caterers to use (or which large-scale dishes they could produce themselves) twenty years past when they held their first formal party.

Entertaining wasn’t the only skill ladies expended their energies acquiring. Wedding cakes were very typically baked by a member of the family, and in some cases even iced and decorated at home, although if no-one had that skill they might engage a professional to decorate the cake that had been made to Grandma’s secret wedding-cake recipe. Wedding cakes (outside of the U.S. at least) were typically fruit-cake with royal icing: fondant was the untraditional new-fangled innovation that butter-cream was a few years ago.

And many ladies could sew admirably, or at least knew dressmakers, so relatively more dresses were made for the occasion. My Auntie V. made my sister’s dress largely inspired by newspaper coverage of Princess Elizabeth’s wedding, and my (now-ex-) sister-in-law made her own. In fact, thinking about it, I don’t know anyone in my generation or the next who actually had to resort to an off-the-rack dress.

And lastly, weddings were much more about a substantial change in life circumstances for the bride and groom, and much less about a once in a lifetime chance to be the centre of attention. Over-the-top celebrity weddings were not on the front page of every check-out stand magazines because weddings, even the weddings of Hollywood starlets, were still treated even by the press as a personal and religious event. So weddings with two-hundred-plus guests were very much the exception: your pretty much invited the people from her, and the groom’s mother’s social circles, and only intimate family members bothered to travel to the wedding, which was very commonly celebrated only with an afternoon cake-and-punch or luncheon reception. Girls didn’t worry about whether their wedding was “cookie-cutter” — they were too busy worrying about whether they would be able to actually live with a man and actually run a household. They focussed on preparing to bring their personal style and creativity to their “new” job of being a home-maker.

Post # 15
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

OMG I don’t even know.  When my Mom and I were talking about her wedding recently she said she just saw a dress she liked in the newspaper (or in a catalog?) and had my Grandpa order it for her and it worked out perfectly.  I know in her case it was really easy to find the venue because it was pre-determined haha.  I just can’t even imagine…I think it’d almost make it easier, at least in my case because I’ve agonized over every decision and felt awful about my wedding thanks to that damn Style Me Pretty website.

Post # 16
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i brought this up to Fiance… he looked at me with the *duh* look and said, “They went to the local church and asked the pastor to marry them. And they went to the local cake shop and got a cake. And went to the local flower shop and got flowers. People didn’t need to invite their bestie from Holland because most people didn’t have a bestie from Holland.” (referencing my best guy friend who will be flying in for the wedding)

LOL i don’t think he even knows what all goes into a wedding…

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