(Closed) How did letting your bridesmaids pick their own dress work out?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 31
Member
3443 posts
Sugar bee

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soontobemrsKB92615:  I was a bridesmaid in a “pick your own black dress” wedding. It was the best! Your wedding party looks great!

Post # 32
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I think this completely depends on how picky you are as a bride.  I told my girls to pick whatever black dress they wanted.  One girl got her dress maybe the week of the wedding?  I was confident they wouldn’t show up naked and I trusted them to be tasteful.  Everyone looked great and was comfortable.  

I think this works if you pick an easy color and truly do not care about controlling what they wear and if it won’t stress you out.   If you have any sort of vision it might just be easier to pick something for them. 

Post # 33
Member
2445 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It was great! I only asked that it be peach. I had 3 bridesmaids so it wasn’t super complicated and luckily they all found dresses on ModCloth so the colors were complimentary.

Post # 34
Member
2035 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I told the girls the colour, the length, and that they had to all have the same one – so a little bit different from the majority of this thread. They ended up picking a dress that looked fabulous on all of them. I wouldn’t have picked it, but now, I couldn’t imagine them in a different dress. They all looked amazing.

Post # 35
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2017

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aubreeleann03:  I love the navy dresses and the matching necklace, you all look so wonderful! I also want to do mismatched navy dresses, what color suits did the groom and groomsmen wear?

Post # 36
Member
732 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I have four bridesmaids and am having them all order from the same website.  I already chose the color and length and fabric, and have like 12 choices I’ll send them to choose from that I really like.  The dresses range from 100-150.  The two that have seen the ones I like, have said there are multiple ones that they really like as well.  So hopefully that all works out!  I’m in a wedding where we tried to do the same dress in different colors and two of the girls apparently didn’t order in time, but I think it’ll be okay.  I figure everyone will be looking at the bride.

I saw a college friend on facebook got married recently and her bridesmaids are all in blue.  Some long, some short, some dark, some light.  It looks great.

Post # 37
Member
614 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

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coffeeice:  I loved the way it turned out. They all wore short booties for shoes too, since it was fall! My groom/groomsmen wore light grey with navy vests/ties. Here’s a pic of what the whole bridal party looked like together!

 

Post # 38
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I told them what color and the length and then let them all pick what they wanted! It turned out so well and everybody loved their dresses. My cousin is even using hers again as her prom dress this year! 

Post # 39
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I have 4 bridesmaids, none of whom live in the same area or who know each other well, and with completely different body types and ethnicities.  I gave them a number of ‘rules’, but asked them to pick their own style.

I first picked a designer and fabric type, and then gave them 3 color choices – they all picked the same one!

Next each picked their own style, and they are all totally different – it would have been very difficult to get them all in the same style.  I started a weddington way showroom where they could add the dresses that they liked, and so others could see them :).  This worked really well!

I also gave them an ordering deadline.   I am ordering for them because I get a discount at the local shop, am shipping them over, and then they are reimbursing me.  I don’t expect problems being reimbursed since they are all very finance-conscious ladies.

Post # 40
Member
4890 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

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chrissybee:  It was great, but I also had a small bridal party – 2. Once I decided on a color and the designer who had that color, I just wanted the dresses to be long and the same fabric. This allowed both of them to try on many different styles and to find on that worked great and flattered them.

We had a shorter engagement (8 months total), so decisions needed to be made quick to get them in with no rush. So, once I found the color, etc… I went with my Bridesmaid or Best Man shopping one evening since she lives in the same city. My Maid/Matron of Honor (sister) lived out of town, and just went to a salon in her city with a couple of fashion-forward friends and selected a dress. Once she found it, I submitted both orders to the salon in town that they were ordered from and it was done.

They were similar dresses, but yet different.

Post # 41
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think you definitely need to be very specific about the shade, and approve the dresses before your girls buy them.  I’ve seen this go very wrong multiple times, where the level of formality is all over the place, the colours don’t make sense, etc.  It can look very random!

Post # 42
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

My best friend did this and it was a complete mess. There were 6 of us and the only guidance we received was to get a “silver” dress. We ended up looking crazy but she totally did not care so i guess in the end it was okay. Some of us were in satin others long others grey vs silver…I personally thought we looked like a hot mess!

 

however I will say I absolutely LOVE the mismatched look. I am doing this for my wedding in June and so far it’s working great (knock on wood). I told them to get any dress they wanted that was long, flowy and nude/tan/blush. I have 7 girls and one guy (tan suit) and so far I love all of their dresses and the light shades are matching nicely. I think this can only work if you truly do not care what they wear and will be happy with what they are happy in. I want them to all feel great and as long as it loosely goes with my theme, I like it. I personally feel like bridesmaids aren’t just a team of matching minions but my best friends so I want that to come through on the day of.

Good luck! 

 

Post # 43
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I had 3 BMs and a MoH. I knew I wanted my MoH to be in the same color as my sash which was like an eggplant or wine, and then the BMs were instructed to pick from color samples that I sent them. Since they were all out of town, I sent my MoH a sample of fabric from my sash and I sent all 4 of them the same color samples. They 3 BMs were instructed to let me know which color from the samples their dress was, so I could tell the other BMs not to get that color. I also sent them all a print out with photos of the styles – long, flowy, with statement backs. I loved how it turned out!

 

Post # 44
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I’m doing this and I thought it would be easy- different shades but knee length and the same fabric. We’re all over the country so I figured email would be the best way. 

-I sent out an email around Xmas like here’s a sale on dresses, these could all work, and one of my bridesmaids got hers from ann taylor right away. Another went to david’s bridal after sending me a link and ordered one that will work. 

-My third bridesmaid doesn’t like online shopping??? (haha this is crazypants to me)

Also I had said chiffon and maybe lace if they loved it (thinking the nice j.crew lace dresses and maybe I could put 2/4 in lace and 2 in chiffon). But this friend is like well, you said lace was okay, so what about this vibrant cheap looking one from h&m? :/ She’s not into shopping so I feel bad saying good effort, no XD 

She has time. I like looking at clothes online so I’m just going to keep emailing her dresses that have free shipping and free returns. XD

-My last bridesmaid I told her tons of time to get a dress since she’s going through weight changes. Like we could order off ebay a week before, I had no stress there. BUT then her mom came up to visit and was like you need to order a dress now it’ll take weeks to get in!! and then MY MOM was emailing her online options because she thought my aunt was too insistant in buying from a brick and mortar store full price…. so I felt bad there. 

I think links to dresses you like SHOULD work nicely, but some people might not like the stores you link to and have thier own idea of places they want to shop at. 

Post # 45
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I am currently in a wedding where we are picking our own dresses. The bride did not give any direction because she honestly doesn’t care, but I found that this made me harder to choose my dress. Her colors are red, black, and silver. She told us she wanted us to get red dresses but she did not specify a shade of red or a length. I ended up buying my dress first and just tried to find a very true red and sent pictures to the other BM’s. Hopefully it will turn out okay.

I am planning on having my BM’s pick their own dresses because of budget reasons. I plan on giving them color swatches (a range of probably 5 colors), the length I want, and the overall style but not specific fabric. I also want them to run it by me first so I can approve it. I will also look for dresses and send them anything I find in a decent price range (under 100). I am worried about nobody buying their dresses though. I might plan a trip to the mall with everyone so we can all shop together.

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