(Closed) How did you ask for RSVPs once your deadline had pasted?

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
  • poll: How did you ask for RSVPs once your deadline had passed?
    I called : (8 votes)
    24 %
    Friends/family called : (8 votes)
    24 %
    Emailed : (7 votes)
    21 %
    Other, comment below : (11 votes)
    32 %
  • Post # 3
    224 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    Well I am not past my deadline…but I have a plan…lol. Since we are doing a destination weding, I want to know asap who is coming and who is not. My rsvp date is 12/10/13. If I don’t hear from anyone by 11/10/13 I will send those people a reminder email asking them to rsvp as soon as possible. If I don’t hear from them by 12/1, I will send another email stating that they need to respond by 12/10. If they do not respond by 12/10, I will send them yet ANOTHER email stating that because I have not heard from them, I am going to assume they are not coming. 

    Annoying?? Yes…brideziila-ish, even. However, I think it’s rude to not rsvp, and I need to make sure I know everything I need for the budget. For the food, wedding favors, welcome bags, etc. 

    I’m not unreasonable though…if someone contacts me to tell me that because of their own situation they wont know until a certain date, then thats fine…I can be patient or even just assume they are coming until I hear otherwise. But if they just blantantly ignore my emails and dont respond, forget it. If they show up, I hope they aren’t expecting a welcome bag, or a chair on the beach, or a fan for that matter while they are standing in the sun. We’ll be doing a buffet at the reception so food wont be a big deal…but I really hope no one on my guest list would do that anyway…

    Post # 4
    46416 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @engleman10513:  The two of us shared the calls. If we connected with someone in person, we told them we needed an answer that day or we would have to mark them as a no and we would miss them at the wedding.

    If the call went to voicemail, we left them a message that if we did not hear back from them by the next day, …… (same message).

    We did however wait unti a couple of days past the rsvp date so we weren’t phoning guests who had popped the rsvp in the mail at the last minute.

    Post # 5
    497 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    I called people and asked for their RSVP. For those that said that they weren’t sure, I told them that I would mark them as a “no” and if anything changes to contact me and I would let them know if they could be accomodated.

    Post # 6
    324 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    The day after my deadline (it was online RSVP’s with the option of also email/phone/text… so no mailing time) I started texting people. I did call a few people that do not do texting, but I despise talking on the phone… so mostly texting. If you have that many people still not responded, then I would split the task with your Fiance.

    Post # 7
    908 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    If it was either of our parents’ friends, they called. If it was one of our friends, we texted, FB messaged, or called, depending on who the person was. We found that texting/fb messaging got the quickest response.

    Post # 8
    1769 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I emailed and some people still didnt reply, so I would suggest directly calling them.

    Post # 10
    7651 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I called on a weeknight around 6:30 becuase I knew most people will have just finished having supper at that time. We didn’t have to call many, but it was nice to be able to call and talk to them directly. If we called and didn’t hear back within 2 days, we RSVP’d an automatic no.

    Post # 11
    11234 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Darling Husband and I split the few people we were still waiting on. A couple we saw in person and asked then, others were either texted or got a Facebook message. Only his brother got a phone call.

    Post # 12
    8694 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    split the list. give your Fiance a list to call from his side and you call your side.


    Post # 13
    1548 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    My mom called my family, FI’s mom called his family and Fiance and I split our friends. We only had about 10 out of 220 people who didn’t RSVP before the deadline. 

    Post # 14
    1227 posts
    Bumble bee

    Out of 75 invites sent, I was only missing about 8 responses. Our RSVP date was Aug 19, and yesterday I emailed the missing people a note like this:


    Hi John (and Jane!)


    I just wanted to drop you a quick note to follow up with you regarding our wedding. I don’t have your RSVP yet, so wanted to make sure you had in fact received our invitation to our September 7th nuptials.   You can RSVP online by visiting our website at http://www.mywedding.com/XXXXXX if that is easier for you.


    Hope all is well and you’re having a great summer.


    I did personalize it for each guest (“I know you guys have had a difficult summer so I just…”).


    Calling people makes me feel too much like a telemarker.lol  If we had more than a handful of outstanding no responses, I would have definitely made my Fiance call his guests, while i called mine.


    I have heard from pretty much everyone as of today (3 outstanding I think, and I’m just going to assume they aren’t coming, as we aren’t serving a dinner, so we have that flexibility)


    Post # 15
    6531 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @engleman10513:  I called and said hey (persons name), how are you? just wanted to follow up with you to see if you will be attending the wedding?

    thats it, short and sweet.

    I knew that there were going to be a few late responses for a good reason. others just forgot to mail the RSVP

    Post # 16
    7219 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    We had our parents call people. Really the only people that doesn’t respond were people that we didn’t know very well but our parents insisted they be invited. I would suggest calling. Some people don’t check their email very often and an email is a lot easier to ignore than a phone call! We don’t have most people’s email but we do have everyone’s phone number.

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