(Closed) How did you ask your bridesmaids/groomsmen/MOH/BM to be in your wedding???

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
10306 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

“So… uh, you’re a bridesmaid. Cool? Alright cool.”

Post # 4
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

The knot was giving out free “Bridesmaid proposal kits” so I signed up for one. Basically made a “I can’t say ‘I do’ without you too…will you be my Bridesmaid?”” cards and wrote a heartfelt letter inside on how much they meant to me. I gave them out when I was alone with each girl. Everyone loved it and accepted with a hug! One friend even got teary lol.

Post # 5
3437 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

Yea I’m neither artsy nor extra and cutesy stuff isn’t our thing at all so I just sent everyone a text msg. lol ‘You’re a bridesmaid, dress and shoes is all you need. If I have one no strippers at the bachelorette party!’ Although I’m kind of rethinking the stripper thing. One of the Bridesmaid or Best Man was telling us about a guy who lit his stick on fire and the visual was quite enteryaining. 🤔

Post # 8
6804 posts
Busy Beekeeper

View original reply
futuremrsdiamond :  Phone call to the girls – they already knew anyway.  ‘asked’ right away as we only had about 6 months until the wedding.  For the guys, my husband did a coin toss game a few times, occasionally on the phone with his brothers, until it narrowed down (the same brother won every time, amusingly).  They really didn’t care that much anyway – first family wedding for most of them.  We’re classy folks smile

Post # 9
473 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

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futuremrsdiamond :  I did something very similar to the PP, I wrote a card to each girl asking them to be my bridesmaid and bought them each a bottle of wine that had a cute apron on it, with a funny “wine” saying (I got a small trinket for my 14 year old niece) and asked them privately! Simple, but still something for them to keep and remember the moment! Here’s a pic! (Sorry it’s so big!)

FullSizeRender (18)

Post # 10
1249 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I just asked them, either in person the next time I saw them or over the phone (I have 5 and 3 are out of town). Personally I think all of those bridesmaid proposals are a bit over the top- especially (as I’ve seen) if you take them all out together or something and give them to them- it’s so much pressure for everyone to say yes. 

I got engaged Aug. 2016, my Maid/Matron of Honor I asked immediately and the rest I asked within a couple of months. I’ve heard on other boards that you should wait until 6-8 months out (in case relationships change) but given how long it can take for bridesmaid dresses to come in I’m glad I asked when I did. 

Post # 11
67 posts
Worker bee

I grabbed little wooden boxes from the craft store and painted them and then added an EOS chapstick (I was going to do nail polish but I was too far in advanced to know what color would match my wedding colors), a ring pop, a tiny bottle of tequila with a recipe I typed up for making a little Patron margarita that you drink out of the little bottle and a card that said “Will you be my bridesmaid?”

I asked my two cousins very early on because I knew that I could count on them being around for the day since they are family. I am going to ask my Future Sister-In-Law and I haven’t had the opportunity yet – I was pondering the idea for a while and have recently decided to ask her. She lives in another state so I don’t see her often so the next time I see her I will give her a box. For her, instead of the EOS chapstick I ordered a personalized bookmark on Etsy with her name on it because she loves to read. 

My Fiance, on the other hand, I don’t know what he is planning. Probably just a call to his best friend to be best man and texts to everyone else. 

Post # 12
1146 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I’m also artsy, as in I’m an artist lol but I still simply asked “Will you be my bridesmaid?”. Two of them I asked during our family Christmas eve party when sharing secret santa gifts. One I asked while sharing tea at her favorite restaurant (A british brunch spot). They were so happy and that was all that was needed. I’m artsy, I love doing projects but I like to leave genuine moments genuine.

I asked them all pretty early, about 17 months before the wedding lol (long engagement), which I shouldn’t have but two of them are my cousins (they’re like sisters to me) and the other one is a lifelong friend. I know drama happens with people which is why the shorter time is recommended but we’re pretty chill people and we wouldn’t talk about wedding stuff for months at a time, I just wanted to tell them already lol, so it was fine.

Post # 13
44 posts

My one SIL gave us each a bag that said “Meet me in Montauk,” which is where they got married and gave us a card asking if we’d be her bridesmaid with a cute note inside. My other SIL just asked me, but that was in 2005 and way before the trend of the whole “bridesmaid-posal” started. 

Post # 14
477 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I wasn’t going to see any of my three friends for at least a few months after I got engaged because we all live in different countries. I sent flowers to each of them on the -1 anniversary of our wedding with a nice card. Not expensive or complicated, but they regularly receive them from me for birthdays etc. and I know they are very much appreciated. 

However, birthday flowers tend to go to them at work and I sent these to their houses.

Post # 15
42 posts
  • Wedding: September 2018

So.. 3 out of 5 of my BMs, 3 out of 5 of FI’s Groomsmen, and my junior Bridesmaid or Best Man and Ring bearer were all going to be at the same place at the same time.. We were on a budget but still wanted to do something fun. So we bought small brown boxes from the dollar store and filled then with the paper crinkle stuff. Then put in a shot glass (men’s said groomsmen and ladies said bride tribe). And then also put in a mini bottle of alcohol. (50 mls?) (we did whiskey for guys and vodka for girls). Then in the inside of the box lid I decorated them and typed up “will you be my MOH/BM/BM/GM”. Tied them up with string and a tag with their names on it! 

It was so fun doing it as a group because they opened them and were all so surprised! Then we all did a shot!!! 

Then we just gave the other 4 boxes to our other BM/GM when we saw them.

As for the junior Bridesmaid or Best Man and ring bearer we did the exact same thing but the inside had a ring pop! They were so excited as well! 

You can do this pretty inexpesively as the supplies (box, paper crinkle, paper to decorate, string/tag) are all from the dollar store. And the bottles of alcohol aren’t a whole lot….  Then it’s just about finding whatever shot glass you want, you don’t even need one that says anything at all (there was cute mason jar ones at dollar store I saw!) Somehow I didn’t even take a picture of them.. But hope this gives someone an idea 🙂 

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