(Closed) How did you choose your officiant?

posted 10 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 32
Member
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Our officiant will be my SO’s brother. We’re really happy that he is going to perform the ceremony for us. He said the process for becoming ordained was relatively simple. Our close friends were also married by another close friend last year.

Post # 33
Member
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

We’re getting a friend to officiate. We looked online at a few people – and some of them looked really cool! But then we found out how easy it is to have someone become a marriage commissioner for a day in our province – so we asked a friend. He was shocked that we asked him. I kind of felt like we were proposing to him!! We are going to plan out the ceremony for him (with his input if he wants of course!) I’m really excited about it actually.

Post # 34
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Consider asking friends or acquaintances who’ve married recently for recommendations. Ours was recommended to us that way. He is a minister at a church in our area, but he’ll also travel to a couple’s wedding site and perform religious or secular ceremonies. Perhaps a judge or other official in your area is willing to travel to a couple’s site to perform the ceremony.

Post # 35
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Neither my fiance or I are religious so we are having a friend officiate.  He is my oldest friend that I have known since we were in diapers together, and he also happens to be the person that introduced me to my fiance. He got ordained online years ago through the Universal Life Church kinda of as a joke, but now we are putting the ordination to good use. 🙂  I couldn’t imagine anyone else marrying us. 

Post # 36
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It really depends upon the state in which you are getting married and that state’s laws. For instance, Tennessee’s state law is very specific about what sort of religious official or state official can marry you, but quiet vague as to what qualifies as an actual religious official in their eyes other than they must be ordained by a church denomination as a “deliberate act.” TN, AL and Vermont do not recognize ULC ordinations. Other states allow you to get a one-day pass for a lay person to perform your marriage, like California. 

Very few states will challenge the validity of a marriage until you go to court over divorce, death and inheritance, etc. 

Post # 36
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It really depends upon the state in which you are getting married and that state’s laws. For instance, Tennessee’s state law is very specific about what sort of religious official or state official can marry you, but quiet vague as to what qualifies as an actual religious official in their eyes other than they must be ordained by a church denomination as a “deliberate act.” TN, AL and Vermont do not recognize ULC ordinations. Other states allow you to get a one-day pass for a lay person to perform your marriage, like California. 

Very few states will challenge the validity of a marriage until you go to court over divorce, death and inheritance, etc. 

Post # 37
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

our officiant married my parents over 30 years ago.

Post # 38
Member
8736 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

My godfather is a circut court judge and we want him to be our officiant. The only problem is I don’t think Maine allows judges to marry people unless the judge is a resident of maine.

Fiance and I are trying to decide whether to get legally married either before or after the ceremony by a JOP but have my godfather perform the wedding ceremony infront of everyone or trying to find someone else to do the ceremony and just have my godfather there as a guest.

Post # 39
Member
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I found her online through a web search for local JPs. I liked her website, her attitude, and the sample ceremonies she had posted. I was a little worried beforehand because she seemed a bit flaky, but she was perfect on the day of. Extra bonus: we really hit it off (she stayed for the reception) and have hung out a few times since then as friends. I’d say trust your instincts. That’s what I did with all our wedding vendors and every one worked out great. If it feels right, it is right; if it doesn’t, keep looking!

Post # 40
Member
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Our’s is one of the retired priests we grew up with.  He did our first communion and our first confirmation.  We actually met in confirmation class, so we thought it would be cute if this priest married us as well.  It was important for us to pick a priest that we had a connection with. 

Post # 41
Member
1518 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We used my mother and brother’s pastor. They attend a lutheran church. We don’t attend his church since we have moved but we had met him a couple times attending services while we were in town visiting. He did a great job and has such a positive attitude towards life. 

Post # 42
Member
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Our is the priest that I have known for a couple of years, who I really find to be fun and I think will make our service really special.

Post # 43
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We actually have two officiants, which is a bit ironic because Fiance and I currently are not attending a church. One if the minister that my parents and grandparents grew up with. He married my mom and dad and has been a very close family friend. He is actually my grandparents power of attorney. On top of all of that he was my religion professor in college! How could he not marry me with all of that history?! The other one is the minister Fiance grew up with. My Fiance is the youngest of 4 boys and this minister has married all of his brothers. We just couldn’t pick one, so now we have both! 🙂 It has added a bit of complication because one is Episcopalian and the other is Methodist. The ceremony is going to be an Episcopalian service.

Post # 44
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We tried to get the pastor of our church but he’s busy the weekend of our wedding. So we got our Associate Pastor to do it.

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