(Closed) How did you control your bridesmaids?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think that’s a beautiful dress BUT…what are the body types of these girls? They may just feel uncomfortable if they are on the heavier side…I am a plus size girl and satin and I DEFINITELY don’t mix…

Although it is your wedding, if it has to do with them being uncomfortable, you may want to try and compromise. However, if it’s just them being picky, kindly remind them it’s your day and if they don’t feel they can commit to their duties by wearing the dress, you completely understand and it’s a shame…

Believe me, I am DREDDING this because I have 7! I think you got LUCKY with 3! Good luck!!

Post # 4
4031 posts
Honey bee

@mikesBRIDE:  Hmm…tough one. Personally, I actually prefer the first one you posted, but that is not what you asked. 

Some will say that it is the Bride and Groom’s wedding and therefore they get the final say. As a bride myself, I value my friends and family members and want them to be comfortable and feel beautiful, just as I will during the wedding. I see it as they have accepted the honor and request of standing up in my wedding and that I would like to honor them by respecting their opinion. 

Honestly, both dresses are reasonable options. If they wanted to wear something crazy or outside of your color theme, that would be a different story. In order to avoid a fight or stress, I would either compromise or let them pick as long as they stick with your theme/parameters.

That is my opinion, but I know some other bees will disagree… 

Post # 5
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Pay for the dresses yourself. Then they are in no position to complain. Tell them: Wear the dress I choose and pay for if you want to be my bridesmaid,

Post # 8
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Tell them to get bent. It’s your wedding.

I had to wear a dress like the first one and I hated it. Ugh. Shivers. Never again.

That said, I’d be pretty choked if I had to wear the second one you posted.

Post # 9
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

One simple item a stock whip 😛 kidding. sit them down and explain to them that if you were in their wedding andd they wanted you to wear a burlap sack you would. This is your day and its the least they can do.

Post # 10
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Wait…they haven’t tried on the dresses yet??? Then how do they know the first one will look good on?? Not to mention how do they know that yours wont flatter them? Gimme a break…ur girls need to get over it…it’s your wedding. Don’t let them walk all over you, even if they ARE family!

Post # 11
259 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mikesBRIDE:  have your BM’s tried on that dessy dress? because one of mine tried on the shorter version of it last week….and i’ll tell you, the fabric did not seem great, and she said it didn’t feel nice to wear….

If they haven’t tried them on yet, chances are they will not like it when they do.

Post # 12
7311 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

Ity’s a moot point until they actually try the dresses on. Plan a shopping trip and get to it. All of you may be surprised by what you do and do not like once you see things in person.

Post # 13
7901 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I think the Dessy one is much more flattering than the Watters one and has a chance of being reusable. The Watters one looks very much like a prom dress to me.

I also agree that until you try on dresses, there is no point in fretting about it.

If you insist on a style they hate, you may have to pay.

Post # 14
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Judging from the modesty in the gown they like maybe they are concermed with your pick showing too much in the back and front (thats definately an unforgiving of back fat dress lol). Since they are so similar I would just let them have it. If they wanted short or a totally different style and color then thats asking too much.


Post # 15
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I love that Dessy dress, I agree with your BMs.

I chose a Dessy color for my BMs and let them pick their dress. They still had issues though…

Post # 16
583 posts
Busy bee

I just want to say, unless your bridesmaids look physically identical to the model in the Dessy one, that dress will look terrible on them.  My bridesmaids tried on that dress in the shorter style, and the top made them look like clowns with how it fit on their chests and where it poofs out from the band under the chest.

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