(Closed) How did you decide when to TTC? TTC fears…

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Obviously, it’s completely different for everyone, but I can tell you I didn’t start getting major baby fever until I was 30. At 26, it was still, yes, I definitely want kids in the future. At some undefined point in the future. In my circle, people really didn’t start having kids on purpose until after 30 as well. For me, it was like a switch– before that, I would hold a baby and think, omg so cute, so precious, I want one at some point down the line. Then, after 30, I would practically feel my ovaries kicking me to make one 🙂 

So to me, you are totally normal for your age! I think it is just different for everyone. 

Post # 5
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think I could’ve written a lot of this myself.  Darling Husband and I both want kids but we’re pretty terrified of the massive upheaval to our newly-formed lives it would bring.  Except that I’ll be 29 next month, so I’m getting to the age wear many of my similarly-aged coworkers have started having kids left and right.  Fortunately most of my friends are not ready yet, so I don’t feel too much pressure.

That is until my twin sister told me she was pregnant back in November.  She’s actually about to pop any minute now (…. obsessively checks phone…..nope, not yet!)  LOL.  So having a person that was always right in step with me suddenly ready to take the plunge, well, it’s pretty scary.  (And I myself am POSITIVELY TERRIFIED of the actual delivery… like total tokophobia over here!)  But if I try not too hard to think about it, I’m really excited to get to meet and hold my nephew and be someone’s aunt for real (I have 2 friends’ kids who call me aunt, but I know it will be different for my own flesh-and-blood).

I guess the point is, you’re in good company.  I’ll probably want to have a talk with Darling Husband about TTC some time next year, but he doesn’t have to know that.  “They” (young parents) all tell me it is worth it, and yes it is a change, but life is about change.  It’s pretty ironic for me to give someone else this advice, but I would try not to worry about until you are ready to actually move forward, and the desire to have a little bundle of joy to love forever outweights the fear.

Good luck!  **hugs**

Post # 6
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Why don’t you wait and see how you feel at 28? I think for a lot of women, 26 is around the age a lot of us start getting the biological instincts of “gee, maybe I do want a baby” (it was for me). I’m 28 now, and we are waiting till i’m at least 30 to try. We will see where we are when that date comes! I think as long as it’s an open, honest, and healthy discussion between you and your husband, then whatever timing is fine!

Personally, i’ve gone by the philosophy of “Once you’re a mom, you’re always a mom”. My husband and I have been living it up and milking this time for all it’s worth. Lots of traveling, lots of exploring our career options, we just moved, etc. We’re doing the things you are less likely to do when you are prioritizing a kid, college, retirement, etc ahead of everything else. Babies can wait a few years!

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