(Closed) How did you feel about your bridal shower/bachelorette?

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 17
Member
9564 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i am working with my Maid/Matron of Honor to plan the bachelorette party,

my shower is going to be a surpise.

 

Post # 18
Member
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

My bachelorette party was a bit of a let down, and the only thing I expressed was wanting to go to a casino. I was asked the day before if I’d want to go to a comedy show…not really my thing but said I was open to whatever. I just wanted to go dancing all night. I guess it wasn’t relayed to the other guests because no one was dressed for dancing, and 4/7 girls left about 30 minutes into arriving at the club. It was a let down.

My bridal shower is coming up. I think it’s this weekend. I told my Maid/Matron of Honor I did not want to be surprised of the date because I wanted to look nice. My mom told her no. Somehow, my mom won out. But, I’m dressing up in case it is this weekend. When I told my mom I wanted to find a dress to wear, she said there’s no reason to wear a dress…so I may be overdressed. Oh well! Also, I’m currently refraining from wheat, and my mom and Maid/Matron of Honor know that, but I think it’s going to be the typical junk type food, cheese, crackers, etc. We’ll see.

Post # 19
Member
1653 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

View original reply
@mrsm915:  +1 about the not making the bride feel like it was a burden!  I recently went through this and dealt with some people who made a huge deal about spending money when I wasn’t asking for much of anything!  

Post # 20
Member
1653 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

View original reply
@mrsm915:  +1 about the not making the bride feel like it was a burden!  I recently went through this and dealt with some people who made a huge deal about spending money when I wasn’t asking for much of anything!  

Post # 21
Member
722 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@indecisivebride89:  I think the host should ask the bride what she would like (if she wants to be surprised or have an input) I don’t feel anyone should be put in a situation (ie: strippers @ a bachelorette party) that makes them feel uncomfortable or upsets them. I also think that the bride should be able to invite other friends that might not be a part of the bridal party, if she wants to. All in all, I feel the bride should have has much input as she wants, IMO.

Post # 22
Member
7308 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

When I was the bride

What did you think about your bridal shower and bachelorette parties? Loved both events. It was so nice to be surrounded by my favorite ladies.

Did the hosts ask you what you wanted? Yes. Maid/Matron of Honor asked me whethwer I prefered an in-home or restaurant-based shower? I told her I prefered something in a restaurant and suggested 4 different restaurants that I knew were tasty and affordable and had a private room. Maid/Matron of Honor handled all planning, and my parents paid for everything. So the exact location and theme of my shower were a total surprise. All I knew is that I was required to wear something bright pink.

 For my bachelorette, Maid/Matron of Honor asked me what kind of vibe I wanted (answer: low-key and at a convenient time for my Mommy friends to have childcare). then she planned a few options, ran them past me, and I selected my favorite. Once I selected my favorite plan, she handled all of the scheduling and such. 

And would you prefer them to ask what you wanted or should you just find out the day of and be surprised? I prefer being asked. I am 100% type A; I am not a big fan of surprises.

Was anyone disappointed in their days? Or begin off disappointed and then just suck it up and realize that you were with people you loved and ended up having fun? No disappointment here. They were exactly what I was hoping for. Small, low-key, stress-free, and overflowing with laughter.

Also…was there anyone who you LOVED and wanted to be there, but you were worried would kind of bring the party down? Did they suck it up for the big day or did they actually bring the party down!?!? Nope, none of those issues for us.

When I was the bridesmaid a few weeks ago:

What did you think about your bridal shower and bachelorette parties? She LOVED them (or so the groom tells me)

Did the hosts ask you what you wanted? And would you prefer them to ask what you wanted or should you just find out the day of and be surprised? Yes, I asked her what she wanted for the shower (location, food preferences, guest list, surprise status). Her preferences were, ummmmm, challenging. It was a 52 person guest list, but she didn’t want it at a restaurant or someone’s home, and she wanted us to organize something putluck when 75% of the invited guests would be traveling from out of town if they attended. Basically what she wanted would have required $450 to rent the hall, plus catering, plus all of the other decor and such…. and I was the only bridesmaid who was paying. So after months of trying to make it work I gave up and did it my way. The shower was at someone’s home, I cooked all of the food and made all of the drinks, her Mom and I planned all of the decor, and then the homeowner, her Mom, and I did all of the set-up and clean-up. It turned out so lovely. The bride cried happy tears when we surprised her (she asked for it to be a surprise). 

For the bachelorette, I asked her for the guest list and her preferred date. Then the other bridesmaids and I brainstormed several options. I presented the options to the bride, she selected her favorite one, and I made all of the necessary reservations and coordinated everything. She selected an afternoon of gambling, followed by a fine dining meal (dinner at The Prime Rib), followed by a bar with a live band.  

Was anyone disappointed in their days? Or begin off disappointed and then just suck it up and realize that you were with people you loved and ended up having fun? She was a bit disappointed with the bachelorette, but there was nothing any of us could do to make it better. Just days before the bachelorette one of the bridesmaids became seriously ill and required emergency brain surgery. The bride was clearly worried about her friend, as we all were, and that definitely put a damper on things. I made sure the bride knew that she could cancel at any moment and no one would be upset with her. We all understood how worried she was, and we would have totally understood if she was not in the mood to celebrate. But she choose to go on with the bachelorette, we toasted the absent maid at dinner, and we made sure to keep the bride as busy and happy as possible.

Also…was there anyone who you LOVED and wanted to be there, but you were worried would kind of bring the party down? Did they suck it up for the big day or did they actually bring the party down!?!? There was one bridal shower invitee who made me extremely nervous. This person has a way of darkening even the brightest of days. She’s just not a pleasant person to be around. Thankfully she did not attend. But if she had, I was fully prepared to sit her down for a very stern talking to before the bride arrived, making it clear that she was not to try and make it all about herself and cast a pall over the shower. Since I knew I didn’t have to deal with this person after the wedding events were done, I really didn’t care if she thought me rude or nasty. She would not be allowed to ruin the bride’s shower. Period. 

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