(Closed) How did you know?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1556 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

No, I don’t think it’s silly at all.  I think sometimes, something just hits you and you know.

My husband and I were very close friends, probably each other’s best friend.  I always enjoyed and looked forward to the time we spent together.  Somehow, we just understood each other.  

A little more than two years ago, we met for dinner, as we often did.  I had a boyfriend at the time and he had recently ended a long-term relationship. We had always hung out a lot, but it was beginning to get to the point where I was spending more time iwth him than with my boyfriend.  

After dinner, he walked me to my car like he always did and we stood and talked a while.  As he said goodbye, he just leaned in and kissed me.  I knew immediately everything had changed.

I already knew we had everything it takes to make a great relationship.  We were already best friends.  I just had no idea he had any interest in me romantically, nor did I realize my feelings for him were more than friendly.  I also knew that he’d not risk both our friendship and my relationship with my then boyfriend, were he not serious about that kiss.  With that one kiss, I both knew where he stood and how I felt about him.  

He asked me to marry him about six months later.

Post # 4
Member
1723 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I knew the moment I saw Fiance walk into our college class there was something different about him.  It was one of those periods where I had sworn off dating and just wanted to do my own thing.  He sat down a couple rows ahead of me, turned around, got up and came and sat behind me.  Then he butted in to a conversation I was having with someone else in the class exchanging numbers, he got mine and called with some story of how he needed help with the class.  I knew better. πŸ™‚  I had confirmation after he told me he loved me the 3rd date and I could tell he meant it.

Post # 5
Member
2714 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I don’t think I ever had that one moment where I just knew. I’d say there were a series of moments that led to that feeling like “this is it”. Like… a week into dating when he took me to the hospital and stayed up all night with me to make sure I was feeling ok. The first time I told him I loved him (I was drunk as a skunk, not my best moment, but he handled the whole thing with grace). When he flew to freakin’ Italy to visit me while I was on a study abroad trip. I think it was a lot of little moments that reminded me why I wanted him with me for the long haul. πŸ™‚

Post # 6
Member
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Our relationship was just right because we were both ready for each other. We could communicate. We trusted each other. We respected each other. We were both our very best selves. There was never drama or jealousy or crying or fighting. It was the opposite of hard. It was meant to be.

Post # 7
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee

I’m not sure there was a “moment” when I knew he was the one, besides the obvious proposal. I will never forget the first time he told me he loved me though…

We had been dating for just over 6 months at the time. We were at my place, spending an evening together just hanging out and watching movies. The movie had just finished, but we were so comfortably intertwined with each other we didn’t want to move, so we just cuddled up closer while the credits were rolling. You know when someone breathes in like they want to say something, but not sure how to say it? I got that feeling from him and it lasted for a few minutes. Finally, he leaned in and whispered in my ear, “I love you, farmerswife6.” I guess I wasn’t expecting it right at that moment so it took me probably almost 30 seconds to reply (poor guy), but I cuddled up even closer and replied, “I love you too, FI”. Most romantic moment for me, ever. I later found out that he had never told anyone else he loved them (probably because he had a turnover of 6 months or less with previous girlfriends). And a week or two before, he was hanging out with a good friend of his (who happens to be officiating our wedding) and was talking about me and his friend says, “Dude, you’re in love with this girl!” Of course he sluffed it off to his friend (you know, big man and all and still fairly new relationship) but I guess he really started thinking about it afterwards.

After that, I slowly started to see signs that this guy could be it. We talked about marriage, but always with an “IF”. We never wanted to assume anything. Until he got down on one knee with a ring…

Post # 8
Member
3368 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I knew he was the one when I felt myself changing from the impatient, sarcastic person I had been into someone who thought before I spoke and was able to stay calm.  I’m still loud and (hopefully) fun, but his gentle, quiet ways have had a permanent influence on me, and my life has only improved for it

So, when I realized that I was appreciating life more and not just running through it like a bull in a china shop~ I knew this was it.  I wanted my children to have the same influence and the thought of life without him became impossible… there was no, hmmm… I wonder what else is out there.  No one could do what he does.

It was either that, or seeing him for the first time and completely losing the ability to think!  πŸ˜‰

Post # 9
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Thorpewood

Haha.  I won’t lie.  The first time I saw him I was thoroughly unimpressed.  Though, in his defense, I had just gotten out of a bad, long-term relationship and had sworn off men.  But, the first time we met, we were already finishing each other’s sentences.  If I hadn’t been so bitter towards men, I would have been gushing over him.  But, well, I didn’t even care lol.  We facebook chatted and then he asked me out and it was lovely.

As for the first time I knew I loved him…I didn’t really know until a second before I knew he was going to say it.  I had been dreading him saying it because I absolutely was not ready to say it back.  When I knew it was coming, I found myself really really anxious but in a good way.  I wanted him to say it so I could say it back.  πŸ™‚

Knowing that I wanted to marry him?  Ummm we had a really embarrassing moment (erm, in bed…) and we just laughed and laughed and laughed.  He could have made me feel awful because the embarrassing moment was totally my fault.  But he didn’t.  And I knew that he was the one because he was so light-hearted and fantastic.  Lol.

Post # 10
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

On our fourth date since meeting two weeks before, we were bowling on the Wii and I hit his coffee tablewith the remote (He had expensive, new, dark furniture) taking a small chunk out and leaving a blonde spot.  I looked at him, looked at the door, and then he got out a sharpie and colored the spot in.  I pretty much knew.  I had already suspected I would be marrying him since the 3rd date but that was pretty much the clincher. 

P.S. the next time I came over to his apartment he had a bandaid over the coffee table spot I hit.  He told me the coffee table had a boo boo. 

Post # 11
Member
467 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Fiance and I met online through a mutual friend. I just knew straight away but the thing that really got me was when I ran out to say goodnight to my mother (at 2am) and she took one look at me and said “who have *you* been talking to?” and I just beamed at her.

We said we loved each other 3 days later, were dating after a week and met after a month. We’ve moved pretty fast but I haven’t regretted anything. As soppy as it sounds, he completes me. He makes me laugh, he loves me for my wacky, crazy, girlyness and we just get along so well. He went to work a few hours ago and we were lying in bed (it’s 2am here) and he goes “It’s amazing how easy it is to be with you. This really is the best thing that ever happened to me.” And I feel exactly the same πŸ™‚

Post # 12
Member
80 posts
Worker bee

At first I didn’t know at all.  But now I know every time I’m with him. <3

Post # 13
Member
4014 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I knew he was the one because I stopped looking…and he was there. And has been ever since!

Post # 14
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I had a system for dating. I had tons of friends who were setting me up and I was also dabbling a little on-line. I had rules around it. Here’s a few:

1) Never a dinner date the first time. Only drinks in case I didn’t like you, I could escape. 2) No seeing eachother 2 nights in a row or in the same weekend. I was a busy girl and didn’t want some guy sucking up all of my time. 3) No kissing on the first date. 4) Never letting him pick me up. I didn’t want anyone knowing where I lived.

I was really nuts. Anywho, I broke all of these with him. I think I knew a couple days into writing back and forth that it was different. That he might have been the one. Good thing I was right! 

Post # 15
Member
1523 posts
Bumble bee

@TinyTina: Haha my fiancé and my second date was at the ER because I injured my rotator cuff. That’s how you know they’re a keeper! If they go to a hospital within a week, they’re a keeper!

 

Other reasons beside that…he’s never given up on me. I’ve had the roughest couple of years dealing with my mental health issues and going to counseling and he’s stuck by me and never doubted that everything will get better. He’s so confident and I know that he’d never do anything he didn’t really want to, so I know he really does love me. It’s just unconditional. He makes me feel safe and secure. There hasn’t been one “This is who I’m going to be with forever” moment. With my ex I did, ironically. (Four years ago). We were only together 7 months and he ended up cheating on me. So I don’t necessarily trust those feelings. I trust my fiancé’s stability and never-ending love. No matter how bad things get, he never doubts we’ll get through it. It’s helped me really believe, too πŸ™‚

Post # 16
Member
1737 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it started when he suggested that we go on a “date” with my daughter. She was just under two years old at the time, and I had kept them from meeting because I already knew from previous experience that most 20-something guys run away in terror from a 24-year-old single mom. I didn’t want that to happen with him. So when he suggested it was time for him to meet her, I started to realize he was different. He took us to the aviary downtown, and it was a great day.

Then there was the first time he said, “I love you.” I couldn’t say it back. I just wasn’t sure, and I was scared of saying it and regretting it. He was so understanding. He just said, “It’s okay, I can wait.” I said it back about a month later, and I meant it with all my heart.

A few months after that, my mom and I had reached the end of our collective ropes. We’d been living together to help both of us save money, but we were at each other’s throats constantly and it just wasn’t a good environment for anyone anymore. He opened his home to me and my daughter and never looked back. He likes to joke that we’re his, “ready-made family,” but seriously, the way he loves us is a bit of a miracle to me.

Now, just thinking about him fills me with happiness. He is the light and love of my life. Every day only gets better with him. He’s just amazing πŸ™‚

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