How did you wear your hair as a bridesmaid?

posted 4 months ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
11813 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

The bride only has discretion over the dress. If she tries to dictate hairstyle or professional hair, or a specific stylist that is inappropriate. Yes, even if she pays. Ditto the same shoes, nail color and accessories. One size does not suit all and you are not her dress up doll or prop. If a group of you approaches her tactfully, it might be your best bet. 

With fine hair, an updo could look flat too. Would beachy waves or curls create the look of more volume? 

Post # 3
1908 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

I also have fine hair and I always do an updo, as it is the only thing that makes it look like you have any volume. Beachy waves and curls fall out, anything straight goes flat in the summer or outside as soon as any wind hits it. I usually do a low pinned curls style with some volume on top. It keeps you cool because everything is off your neck, but also keeps you hair in place for the whole time!  

Post # 4
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2000

Side type bun thing 😂


Post # 5
2484 posts
Buzzing bee

I always where my hair down with curls or maybe clipped up to the side.  I hate updos.  

Post # 6
381 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - York, ME

I have very fine (but dense) hair, and I wore it like this in a recent wedding.  She teased the crown A LOT and I thought it was too much volume but it looked nice in phtotos.  The curls also stayed all night, but she pinned them and let them cool for a long time before releasing them. 


Post # 7
3530 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 29th, 2016

mrsclaymls :  I was a Matron of Honor in a July wedding (the end) and despite it being hot, I still wore my hair down because that’s my preference. My hair is thick and naturally curly but I flat iron it 99% of the time. For fine hair, do a cute updo or side-swept style with some texture – waves or curls. 


Post # 8
2215 posts
Buzzing bee

mrsclaymls :  You can always do an updo! The bride shouldn’t try to dictate hairstyles.

Post # 9
1439 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

I’ve been a bridesmaid a bunch of times, and have done my hair a bunch of ways!

Sideswept for my sister’s December wedding

Loose updo for my friend’s traditional Indian wedding 

Updo my my best friend’s hot hot humid summer wedding 

Half up-do for a friend’s windy fall wedding 

If you expect it to be hot, getting your hair up off your shoulders is a great idea! 

Post # 10
3093 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

The bride is going to be sorely disappointed if she is expecting everyone to wear the exact same hairstyle. Everyone has different hair and different facial structures so the same style won’t even look the same on everyone, even if they were all able to pull off the exact style. 

It’s much better to at most suggest a theme and let each individual and/or/with their stylist figure out a good style for them. 

I have super fine hair as well that doesn’t hold texture well. I also have a tendency to touch my hair a lot, especially if it is down, so when I’ve been a bridesmaid I usually go for an updo that is held tightly in place with a lot of product and a lot of pins so I am less tempted to touch it. 

Last wedding I was in wanted a sort of “vintage” theme and i went with a similar style to this with a twist across the front: 


Post # 11
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2021 - British Columbia, Canada

I just straightened mine (at the time my natural rich chestnut hair was down to my mid-back and looked really healthy/used lots of shine balm) and totally regret not doing more when looking back… BUT:

1) the bride told us to make sure we were comfortable above all else

2) originally she had arranged for us all to have hair/makeup done together, but this did not come to fruition (and paying for ourselves with her stylist was apparently not an option, either – which ended up being fine as the other costs for my fiance and I to travel to her destination wedding quickly added up)

3) I had to do so much last minute running around for her the day of, and the other members of her bridal party and I ended up being squished into her husband’s sister’s hotel room to get ready as they did not want us all crowded into the bridal suite, that I did not have time to go back to my own hotel for anything, let alone try to curl or wave my hair

4) it was new years eve, we were in another country stressed to the max about making sure every aspect of the day came together for the bride and groom, and we did not have enough notice to try and find somewhere to get our hair styled (in hindsight we wouldn’t have even had enough time to make appointments on such a busy day)

5) the bride said she didn’t care if we weren’t all matching/elaborately done up, so I tried not to overthink too much, my hair wound up in a ponytail halfway through dinner and the four ladies that did get their hair professionally done weren’t thrilled with how the humidity affected the styles anyway (bride, bride’s mom, groom’s mom and groom’s sister who was not in the wedding party) 

Post # 12
1424 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

mrsclaymls :  my hair was a little shorter than yours, but I had it pinned up for a low updo (sort of like a twist) with some curled locks loose in the front. I found it hard to find a lot of medium length styles for inspiration.

Post # 13
6945 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I ALWAYS do an updo. I have fine hair as well, and wearing it down is always a disaster and it looks like a mess before the cermeony even starts. Plus, I’m a wedding photographer and I’m 100% team updo for everyone – including the bride. I can’t tell you how many times ALLLLL the girls look a mess before the ceremony because they try to do a style that doesn’t work for their hair. Granted we are on the East Coast, where it’s often humid, and often on a beach…aka wind. 

Post # 14
444 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

weddingmaven :  With all respect you spent the first half of your post pushing your own opinion and not even addressing OPs question.  Friendly reminder – not all customs, traditions, opinions are universal.  While you find it inappropriate, others don’t and there is nothing wrong with that.  

Post # 15
9545 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I always do an updo when I’m a bridesmaid. My hair doesn’t always hold a curl well so I’m more confident that an updo will hold up all day.

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