(Closed) How do guys really feel about being asked to NOT go to a strip club?

posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
3222 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@Neva: I actually didn’t ask Fiance not to go to a strip club (or have a private stripper), but actually made the decision on his own! He was in the miliary and had his fair share of strip clubs! (bleh…don’t even want to think about it!) 

So to answer your question, I think the first guy’s answer is pretty much what my guy would say.

Post # 4
Member
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I have to wonder about who they’re interviewing. Maybe it’s just the circle of people that I know, but almost everyone I know is most along the lines of the first response, or else would only go somewhere a bit more tame (think Hooters, not lap dance).

Post # 5
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

I told my husband he could go but I also wanted him to know that I was uncomfortable with him getting a lap dance. Because of this, he decided to just not go b/c he didn’t want me to be upset or uncomfortable.

Post # 6
Member
4159 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Luckily, I’ve never had to ask Fiance not to go to strip clubs or anything.  He chooses not to.  If he wanted to go though, I wouldn’t have a problem.  I used to go to strip clubs with friends, so I can’t forbid him to go.  He works in the construction industry and a lot of the guys he works with waste their money on going to the strip clubs after work and wonder where all their money is going.  He would rather spend his time/money with/on me, or golfing!!! lol

Post # 8
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

well at the same time most brides wear a sash or something that signifies they are the bachelorete and that draws attention from men. Would you not go out if it made your Fiance uncomfortable?

 

Post # 10
Member
1058 posts
Bumble bee

@Neva: I agree, they all seem pretty young and not thinking as a mature man would think.

Post # 11
Member
3049 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

@Neva: The first response IMO sounds sweet. I don’t see any avoidance there, but that’s just me. I think it represents some of the male population. It doesn’t represent my Fiance. He was never into strip clubs… even when he was not dating anyone. So, I wouldn’t have to ask him not to go. I would have to ask his friends not to take him… but they pretty much know how he feels about the whole thing.

Post # 12
Member
3049 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

@MissCallieJean: If it made my Fiance uncomfortable for me to go out… I would have a conversation with him. A strip club is different from a bar. Yes, you are wearing a sash, but that doesn’t mean you have to look at a guy’s male parts or even talk to him. I would want to know if it’s a matter of trust for him to feel uncomfortable. I think it’s fine that he goes out to bars all the time. The strip club is where he would cross the line. But, some women don’t care either way if their guy goes to a strip club. It’s all about preference.

Post # 13
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

It doesn’t mean that they aren’t going to try to hit on you, which is much like what girls are afraid of when guys go to strip clubs. I kind of see it as the same thing, a guy goes to the strip club and the girls there flock to them (for money) but that sash attracts attention from men at the bar. And at bars people are drunk so if you were to be more worried about something funny going on where would it more likely happen at the strip club, where the girls are working to pay the rent or at the bar with drunk girls that are out to party and have fun??

I absolutely agree with you that it is all about preference.  My SO used to go to strip clubs but since we have been dating he hasn’t and all of his friends are married and their wives don’t like strip clubs so they wouldn’t be going, so it’s not a situation i would really be in.

I’m just trying to bring another perspective to the situation.

Post # 14
Member
1835 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I never asked Darling Husband not to go because well, I knew it wasn’t an issue. However, apparently his Groomsmen all pitched in and hired a private lady for the evening and Darling Husband faked a migraine so they would leave him alone! I didn’t even know it happened until I got an angry/drunk text from one of the Groomsmen blaming me for him faking a headache! ahahahaha that’s my boy.

Darling Husband is just awkward in social situations. He does everything to keep the attention off of him so his b-party was miserable for him 🙁

Post # 15
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I have no problem with my husband going to a strip club, but I told him no lap dances, private rooms, etc.

In the 6 years we have been together, he has never been.  He just doesn’t seem to have much interest.

Post # 16
Member
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@Neva: right. i’m wondering if those men are guessing how they would react if they were engaged and asked not to visit a strip club. does the article say if they are in serious relationships/engaged?

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