(Closed) How do I kindly tell my BMs what their duties are?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

The girls in my bridal party I am extremely close with, so I would say something along the lines of what you said there. “So it is considered rude for the bride to throw her own bridal shower, cause she looks like she is trying to get gifts, however I always imagined having one where my family and friends were gathered together. I am willing to give you ideas and advice, but would you mind getting the girls together and hosting something small?” 

You can throw your own bachelorette party, that isn’t considered rude as it isn’t traditionally a gift giving occation. 

Post # 4
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@navywifenmoore:  First, with the hair and makeup I would just send them all an email saying that if they would like to get their hair and makeup professionally done, these are the prices and here are their websites (if they have them) to check out.  I paid for my girls to get their hair done but left the makeup up to them.  Three out of the five ended up opting to get their makeup done.

As for the other parties, it is considered rude for the bride to plan her own parties.  On the other hand, your girls are not obligated to throw you anything.  Maybe try talking to another one of your BMs about it since you’ve already tried talking to your best friend.  It’s a tough situation.

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