(Closed) HELP! How do I motivate FI to make his side of the guest list????

posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: When did you have your (essentially) completed guest list?
    2 years or more before the wedding : (0 votes)
    1 1/2 years before the wedding : (1 votes)
    4 %
    1 year before the wedding : (6 votes)
    23 %
    10 months before the wedding : (7 votes)
    27 %
    8 months before the wedding : (0 votes)
    6 months before the wedding : (5 votes)
    19 %
    4 months before the wedding : (4 votes)
    15 %
    2 months before the wedding : (3 votes)
    12 %
    later than 2 months before the wedding : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    11168 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    Is there any way you can chat with his mom?

    I had the same issue and finally went to my Future Mother-In-Law to get the details. She had the whole family address list already (they use it for Christmas cards) so it took very little effort.


    Post # 5
    321 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    You know, I had this same problem.  So what did I do? I made it for him.  I called people, emailed them, talked to his family and just got what needed to be done, done. It shamed him into working.

    Post # 6
    588 posts
    Busy bee

    I actually created a guest list of all the people I thought he would want to invite, and had his mom email a list of everyone in the family. Then just handed it to Fiance and had him cross out or add anyone. I just needed to do it myself in order for it to get done. And I now have almost ALL names and addresses.

    Post # 8
    321 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    It wasn’t my intent to shame him into doing his part.  It was simply the only way I could think of getting the addresses.  It was just a by-product.  I’d go with miss.oregon.state’s idea. 

    Post # 9
    3049 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 1991

    I only had 6 months to plan. So our guest list was basically finished at the 3 or 4 month mark. I nagged my Darling Husband to do it…. that was the only way. And it didn’t help that his mother was busy all the time, so I had to nag her as well 🙂

    Post # 12
    1043 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I just sat with Fiance one night while he was watching one of his favorite shows with a pen and paper, and asked him to list off the people during the commercial breaks. It worked wonders! He even called his mom and asked her to e-mail the family addresses to me!

    Post # 14
    1145 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I have told Fiance, that if he doesn’t have the list before I start the save the dates then we will not be inviting anyone from his side. LOL (desperate measures)

    It didn’t take long for him to just write the names down – I had that pretty quickly, I set up and excel file on google documents and gave him the password. He did it at work. Of course my Fiance has been slacking on everything I ask him to do so last time he was in town we had a talk about how it hurts my feelings that he doesn’t follow though with the things he says he will do. I told him that I feel like he doesn’t care about the wedding. he quickly stepped up his game but now I am getting the “I ‘ll do it tomorrow” for him sending the save the date template so I can finsh the magents.. becuase he hasn’t. 🙁 … time for another talk I guess…

    Post # 15
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @Captain013:That’s what I did! I said I needed them by a certain date, and he got them in on time :).

    Post # 16
    1723 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I don’t think asking him to help is nagging. 🙂  I told mine I needed it and so he just called his mom and she did it for him.  We both work hard, so I’m not about to take on more than I have to, especially when he is perfectly capable.  Just let him know you know he’s busy but you still need help.

    The topic ‘HELP! How do I motivate FI to make his side of the guest list????’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors