(Closed) How do i NOT ask best friend to be in my wedding????

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

If all of your attendants will be family, that can be your excuse. 

Post # 4
Member
4682 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

MissHobbit’s suggestion sounds like a good way to break it to her.

Post # 6
Member
4682 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Would it be a problem if she were a Bridesmaid or Best Man but not Maid/Matron of Honor. I’m just thinking of suggestions.

Post # 8
Member
1276 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

If shes that bad of a friend, I wouldn’t ask her period. If she is self centered, you don’t want someone like that around you during your wedding. Don’t regret asking her to be a bridesmaid just to avoid a fight. 

Post # 9
Member
2459 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

If you dont want to be her friend anymore, (which is what it sounds like) why are u worried about her reaction if she’s not in your wedding? 

Post # 11
Member
2459 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Just make her a bm and explain to her why just what u just said to me as why she isn’t Maid/Matron of Honor, let her know that you are keen to work on your rel with her,

Post # 12
Member
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I had a similar situation.  I picked someone else to be my Maid/Matron of Honor and the reason I gave was because I knew that being the Maid/Matron of Honor is a lot of responsibility, very time consuming and very expensive.  Maybe if you explain it that way she will understand and be relieved (especially if she’s selfish). 

Post # 13
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

If you think her self-centeredness would cause you more stress than help, then i would not have her in the bridal party at all, because the point of the bridal party is to help prevent stress on your special day as opposed to creating it. 

 

ETA: the only reason I say this is because it sounds like you’re being guilted into have her in your Bridal Party as opposed to wanting her there. Also she seems like the type to try and be the center of attention at your wedding which is absurd, but happens more often than you might think. 

Post # 14
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think you just don’t ask her. If she asks, be honest and don’t try to hide it from her, but I don’t think you need to call her just to tell her that she is not in the Bridal Party. You don’t owe her an explanation. She might be hurt, and I don’t think you should try to be mean about it, (It doesn’t sound like you would be) but either she is going to be supportive and go with the flow or not. If she can’t go with it she has proven that she wouldn’t be the best Maid/Matron of Honor or Bridesmaid or Best Man. If she goes with it then you guys will still be friends. Good luck and I hope it goes well!

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