(Closed) How do I pay for our wedding???

posted 11 years ago in Money
  • poll: If you had to take out a loan for your wedding, would you...

    Take out a loan to pay for the entire wedding?

    Take out a loan to pay for half the wedding?

    Delay the wedding until you can pay for it without a loan?

    Find a bride with parents willing to pay for your wedding?

  • Post # 3
    458 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Don’t take out a loan!  You don’t want to start your married life in (any more) debt.  I think it’s possible to find lots of stuff within reasonable prices, and lots of vendors, due to the current economic situation, are willing to work with you to find packages that fit into your budget.  Congratulations!

    Post # 4
    1955 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

    Is there any way either parents can contribute something? I know you said you guys are paying for all of it on your own but even a thousand or 2 from each side could really have an impact…I think you should try as hard as you can to save money and NOT take out a loan, even though that sucks…I’m sorry, good luck with everything!

    Post # 5
    2856 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    How about having a very small wedding and then when you can pay for it, have the wedding you always wanted. That always can be an option. But I am with the other ladies in that you should NOT take out a loan. It will just be one more bill added on and it won’t make it easier to pay off if you don’t have the money now.

    You other options are to just scale back on a few details to save you some dough. Check out Martha Stewart Weddings website. She has quite a few tips on saving money.

    Good luck!

    Post # 6
    1205 posts
    Bumble bee

    My Fiance and I are also paying for our wedding.  We have made big cut-backs in our daily living and are starting to sell some of the junk we have laying around my house for craigs list cash.  We’ve also committed a certain amount from each of our paychecks.  Our wedding is Oct. 2010, so we are hoping to be able to save the full amount of about $17,000 by then. 

    I would save as much as you can, and if you end up needing to take out a loan, maybe ask a family member to help with that instead.  Borrowing from someone (with all the formality of a bank loan) might save you a bit.  Lastly, if you are forced to take out a loan I would make it as small as yo possibly can.  Maybe even open a credit card with a 0% intrest rate for the first year – or one for each of you – to cover what you can’t save. 

    Best of luck!

    Post # 7
    2856 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    I forgot to mention in my post that my Fiance and I are paying for most of the wedding and like you we had zero savings with a bunch of bills. From the day we got engaged though, we sat down and went over what we think we could put away with each paycheck for the next 8 months. We set up automatic deposits to our savings account and cut back a lot of misc. spending. We are getting married in a little over a month and have been able to save thousands of dollars since the engagement.

    It is a great accomplishment. If only we started sooner!

    Post # 8
    24 posts

    We had to take out a loan for the wedding. If we delayed the wedding until we could pay for it all at once, we’d never be able to have the wedding. We absolutely did not want to take out a loan and if you don’t really have to DON’T DO IT! haha 


    We got a 20K loan that will be paid in full in 5 years! We are doing GREAT on paying it back and our interest rate is great πŸ™‚

    You might want to cut out real flowers (I am having fake beautiful flowers) or see about having a cupcake cake. DIYBRIDE.com is a great website that has helped me out greatly!!

    Since you just need 10K I would probably say to start saving as much as you can and get a 5K loan

    If you need any advice please PM me and I can help you out.

    we considered going to Vegas πŸ˜€ but his family is HUGE and would be severely upset and we really wanted to have everyone there πŸ™‚  Our loan will be paid off before we know it and it has brought no financial issues between my fiance and I and it won’t even after we are married. Money isn’t everything but be careful because you could make it everything

    GOOD LUCK! I wish you and your family the very best 

    Post # 9
    108 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    We also have huge families, and are paying the wedding ourselves (as well as building a house). Our decision was to have a very small wedding….only siblings, parents & grandparents (and my 2 young nephews, because they are the only ones). This still leaves us with 22 people…but as we took a look at our numbers they jumped to 200 the minute we added cousins and aunts/uncles. We are both very close with all of our family, so it was a really tough decision, but it was the easiest way to not hurt any feelings….we had to find a "clean" breaking point for the guest list, and this was ours. We also aren’t having any friends…this was tough for us, but some aunts/uncles didn’t think that was fair.

    My family threw us a shower 2 weekends ago, so that everyone could see us (and they did give gifts). FI’s family is having a post-wedding "party" for us..not that I ever expect gifts, but I don’t think we will get any from them at this party.

    After we finish our house (next summer), we plan to have a huge potluck bbq/party and invite all of our family.

    Best of luck! The amount of money you will pay on interest for a loan is ridiculous, and I wouldn’t suggest it.

    Post # 10
    303 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    I guess I would probably downsize my wedding rather than taking out a loan! You don’t HAVE to have a dinner, dance, cocktails, etc. My best friend from high school had appetizers and a dessert bar in the early afternoon, and I had a great time! Plus, then you have a reason to start the honeymoon early :).

    I agree that taking out a loan and adding more debt to your finances is not a good way to start a marriage. If you decide to take out a loan though, stick to your budget! Best of luck!

    Post # 11
    309 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    I would really advise against taking out a loan. I have student loan debt and know that I wouldn’t want to increase it. There are so many tips (on this site and others) for saving money.

    See if you have friends that can help — photographers, bakers, musicians, etc. If you’re flexible with your time and date — perhaps look into a Friday evening or a Sunday wedding. I went to a "budget" wedding on a Sunday — they had a smaller invite list and a beautiful brunch buffet afterwards all for a tiny fraction of the price that a Saturday evening wedding would have cost.

    Fiance and I are footing a considerable part of our wedding and, aside from really adjusting our day-to-day living and expenses, we’ve also started hording our credit card points. We both get rewards and have started paying most of our bills with our CCs. This way we’re able to redeem points for wedding related things (I’m planning to get giftcards to buy bm gifts or to pay for hair/nails/makeup for the wedding, etc.).

    Weddingbee is a fantastic resource. Use it! The people here are full of great tips. And, if you do decide to postpone your wedding until you  can pay for it, I think you’ll be relieved to not start your married life with wedding debt.

    Post # 12
    153 posts
    Blushing bee

    I’m paying for our wedding by myself…my FI’s goal is to pay off all his debt (credit cards, school loans) before coming to the States and the expenses of shipping all his stuff here.

    However, before even saving for the wedding, I decided to save for retirement.  Then I saved for the wedding.  I cut out nearly everything in my life that wasn’t necessary.  I have a roommate to reduce rent costs.  I got rid of my phone plan as I use my cell all the time.  I go out to eat once a week max.  I brew my own coffee instead of Starbucks.  I obsessively coupon clip.  I put any bonus money (gifts, tax return, job performance) straight into savings (well, some of it went to retirement and school loans).

    So by the end, I’ll have about 10k.  Knowing that, I reevaluated my wedding.  Since I wouldn’t compromise on the photographer, we decided to have a lunch wedding and reception.  There’s no dancing, although an iPod will be playing.  I bought a dress for less than $400.  We’re DIYing the flowers, invitations, favors (considering cutting those out), hair, and a whole host of things.  As much as I want a DOC, not in budget.  We made a guest list, and we can’t add to it.  We limited family to immediate and first aunts/uncles/cousins.  If people start saying no, then there is no B list; it’ll just be a smaller wedding.

    I’m part of the group that says no to taking out a loan.  If the bills keep piling on, then do you really want another one?  For just one day?  Try to save as much as you can first.  If you do decide to get a loan, then definitely look around for the best interest rates and clear payment plans.  Good luck!

    Post # 13
    14181 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We had to pay for the wedding ourselves. Set aside a certain amount of money that will automatically be deposited into a "wedding bank account" each month. Figure out what you’ll have by your wedding date, with leeway to pay your vendors up front (ie our photographer wanted payment 1 week in advance, our venue, 8 weeks, etc).

    And make it work. Don’t take out a loan. You’ll want a house next, right? You can DIY a wedding sooooo well and make it so affordable if you’re willing to put in the extra work and be creative and open to other ideas. Granted, if you want the Vera Wang and the filet at dinner, you’ll likely be disappointed. So keep an open mind. 

    I got engaged as soon as I started college. I had to borrow 2K from my parents just to cover my living expenses so I could eat! After I paid them back at $500/month, it was October and I was getting married in June. I cut back on everything and constnatly asked myself how much i NEEDED something versus how much I wnated something. New furniture could wait, even though I ‘needed’ it. After I figured out what my average cost of living was each month, I added $200 to that for emergencies. The rest was wedding money. I was able to set aside a substantial chunk each month to contribute my half to the wedding whereas my husband was deployed to Iraq, so he was able to use his combat pay to cover that. I know that’s extra income most people don’t have. But slash our wedding cost in half to 10K and we could have swung that easily. We could have trimmed to 6K and deleted our nice venue and done something much much more simple for just a few grand I bet. Have faith in your ability to be financially savvy and SAVE

    Post # 14
    952 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    Don’t take out a loan. Seriously. Have the wedding that you can afford. If you’re getting married late next year, that gives you over a year to save for it. We’re paying for about 80% of the wedding ourselves and each paycheck we set aside a certain amount of money to buy things for the wedding or to pay for deposits, etc.

    Post # 15
    5282 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Yes, I agree with others do NOT take out a loan! We looked at loans for half a second & the interest rates are CRAZY! Make your budget work, there are many options. You can either to a destination wedding (which if done correctly can be a big money saver) you can have a backyard wedding, do a wedding with just cake & punch, etc.

    You have to be willing to compromise. My Fiance & I are paying for our wedding and its all coming from savings. BUT, I had to compromise and know that I can’t have all the elaborate & expensive things I wish I could have. You just have to be creative and make that doller stretch & it is do-able πŸ™‚

    Good Luck!

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