(Closed) How do you address married women professionally?

posted 4 years ago in Career
Post # 2
1420 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

Ms is generally used as a courtesy if you’re unsure of the marital status of a woman.  But it can be used for both married or unmarried. I suppose the folks writing the press release were fairly certain of her marital status, so referred to her as a Mrs.

Post # 3
2375 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I use Ms. for all women unless told otherwise by that person. I can’t keep track of who’s married, single, separated, divorced or otherwise. It’s marital status neutral. 

Post # 4
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I use Ms. for all women too- it’s a safe bet!

Post # 6
10397 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Ms. unless the person  herself indicates otherwise. 

Post # 7
2550 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I use Mrs. for clients & coworkers I know are married and Ms. if I am unsure. However my office is pretty conservative with these types of things and likes to address people by their appropriate title if we can. We work with alot of elderly for estate planning and trusts and they seem to appreciate us sticking to the “good ol days” type of greetings…. But we also keep track of most clients status in our data software so it’s pretty easy to figure out… 

Post # 8
9548 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I typically do not use titles other than Dr. But if I am going to use a title, I always use  Ms. for all women.

Post # 9
4412 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Mrs.Sawyertobe:  Unless I know for sure a woman is married I always go with Ms. Even then I play it on the safe side and usually stick with Ms. and then mirror back what they say/write to me. I’m a teacher and I can’t tell you how many assumed I was married before I actually was. I was called Mrs. E— in person or in e-mails. Married, my students called me Mrs. or Ms. P—. The sound of Mrs. Lastname is actually weird to me (for myself anyways). I’m not sure why. 

Post # 10
2291 posts
Buzzing bee

If I know the woman is married I use ‘Mrs.’, and if I don’t know if she’s married, I say ‘Ms.’. Obviously I use ‘Miss’ if I know they are young and single. 

Those titles are easy to remember and use, so I just use them properly.

Post # 11
1634 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Ms. I use that for all women unless the woman introduces themself as Mrs. I haven’t heard anyone prefer Miss.

Post # 12
1995 posts
Buzzing bee

Mrs.Sawyertobe:  Use Ms. unless directed otherwise either in person or via correspondence (unless, of course, the woman has a degree that entitles her to be called Dr.).  Never use Miss in a professional setting–the risk of causing offense (many young unmarried women are insulted by this form of address in the workplace) is far too high.

Post # 13
961 posts
Busy bee

Every time I’ve ever been in court for hearings, trial, etc. (I’m an attorney), the judge always addressed me as MS. as did opposing counsel. 

Post # 14
1313 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: A very pretty church.

I do my best to find out their professional/qualification title, if that is not relevant I try to find other places they have been referred to professionally and go with that. There is nothing unprofessional about Mrs or Miss, but they denote a status (and preference?) that I am uncertain of. In the meantime Ms denotes nothing but gender and can’t be technically ‘incorrect’. However, be prepared to be corrected, especially by older and ultra-conservative ladies who will not appreciate being ‘Ms’.

“That’s Miss Smith, I’ve never been married/I’m not divorced/I’m not some sort of feminist.”

“That’s Mrs Smith, I’ve been married 30 years and I am not ashamed.”

Also if you are PC and refer to someone’s ‘partner’ rather than assuming they are straight and married, I’ve had my head bitten off over that too “Husband, not partner, I’m not one of those” >.>

I have always gone by Ms, and will continue to after I am married, it’s my business. That will soon be superseded by a professional title though (fingers crossed), so then I can look forward to letters addressed to Dr and Mrs ‘Taiki’, because as we know a ‘Dr’ is always married, and always to a good lady wife 😛

Post # 15
81 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Mrs.Sawyertobe:  I prefer the term Ms. as well. I like that it is neutral. It’s really no one’s business what your marital status is and should not play into conversations in the workplace. Furthermore, I find Miss to be a childish address and rather belittling when speaking with an equal in the work place.

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