(Closed) How do you call your mother and father in law?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

I’ve been married for over five years, and I’ve completely avoided calling my in laws anything at all. 🙂

Post # 5
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I just call them by their first names. Of course I know them quite well and with so many people all with the same last name, it would be really hard at family gatherings.

Post # 6
Member
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

They aren’t my in-laws, but it took me 6 years of dating and a couple glasses of wine at Christmas to switch from calling my SO’s parents “mr and mrs” to first names. If/when we do get married, I don’t foresee switching again- it was too hard the first time. I think I’ll do like Mr. Bee and just avoid at all costs. 

Post # 7
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I call my future in-laws mom and dad.  After close to 10 years of dating, it was a difficult transition, but in our culture, after you are engaged, you call them mom and dad. At first, it was really awkward and now its normal.  (It took me sometime to get over the idea of having to call someone else mom and dad.  So I just decided that no matter what I called my future in-laws, nothing will replace my parents – my mom and dad. 😉 )

Post # 8
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Only when it’s absolutely necessary to address them directly, I call them by their first names. But, like Mr. Bee, I tend to avoid doing so at all costs…& I’ve been doing that for nearly 12 years of dating!

Post # 9
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Eesh, now I feel a little guilty that I never called his parents “Mr__” and “Mrs. __” !! Was that bad etiquette to call them by their first names from the get-go? I’m sure that’s how they introduced themselves, although I don’t recall that exact moment… :-/

Post # 10
Member
296 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Fiance and I have both avoided calling each other’s parents anything at all in 6 years of dating. LOL

Post # 11
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I call them Mr. and Mrs. I can’t imagine calling them Mom or Dad because they are not my parents. Plus, I am afraid that my parents may feel like they are being replaced. Maybe when I have kids I will call them whatever my kids call them.

After 28 years of marriage, my Mama has managed not to call my grandparents anything. lol But my Daddy calls my grandparents (mom’s parents) Mr. and Mrs.

 

Post # 12
Member
5399 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

We’ve been together for 7 years and married for 1.5 and I’ve avoided calling them anything this whole time!  LOL  I have no clue what to call them and even less of a clue for how to ask them.

Post # 13
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

We don’t see Father-In-Law much so I’ve never had to call him anything. I call my Mother-In-Law by her first name, I’m sure that’s how she introduced herself although it’s taken a good 7 years and several bonding moments (like going to a Turkish bath together) to feel really comfortable with it! He calls my parents by their first names too. They aren’t very formal people. I introduced Darling Husband to my grandparents as Mr and Mrs, and left it up to them if they wanted him to call them by their first names.

Post # 14
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I don’t call him anything at all if i could help it.  in my mind i have quite a few names for him, but the few times i do have to i call him by his first name. 

Post # 15
Member
1317 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

When I first met my future-in-laws, I planned on calling them Mr. and Mrs. Lastname. Thank goodness I ran it by my Fi beforehand cause no one ever calls anyone Mr. and Mrs. here – it’s way too formal. They even refer to their prime minister with his first name, it’s just how it is here! When it is a bit formal, the woman’s first name is always included, never shrouded into her husband’s name (which I love).

I try to avoid directly addressing them, but on the rare moments when I do, I use their first names. I’m getting used to it now, but it’s still a little weird to me.

My Mom, on the other hand, wants my Fi to call her Mom, although she hasn’t told him yet (but plans to). When they first met, my Fi also asked what he should call my Mom and I told him to call her “Auntie”. It’s a cultural thing for respect (you call anyone older aunt or uncle).

Post # 16
Member
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

When I have to use a name, I will use first names – however it took 4 years of dating and 1/2 of an engagement to get there.

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