(Closed) How do you deal with high strung people when you are more laid back?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
2701 posts
Sugar bee

I am always on cruise control. I think some people view this as I don’t care, but in all reality unless it’s life or death, I am not getting worked up about it. There is nothing wrong with being high strung, but I agree they are no fun to be around and sometimes make crappy friends because they accuse you often of “not caring enough”. I would like to think that I will live longer because my heart and mind are healthier, but obviously there’s no proof to that. When I hang around someone that is very high strung, I try to show some sensitivity towards their situation, but I literally ignore the antics. If you ignore their craziness, they tend to learn how to act around you and the fits will more than likely stop. Don’t let this friend get hyped up, it is a waste of energy unless it is very important.

Post # 4
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I am very laid back and my Darling Husband is high strung. He drives me nuts sometimes. I try to accomodate him and others like him a little bit. If they want more specific plans/timelines/whatever I give it to them. But I don’t let myself get sucked into their crazy. I have learned to never say “relax” because they find it patronizing (or at least Darling Husband does).

Post # 5
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

It’s the high strung persons responsibility for keeping their craziness in check, not yours. So if it’s a friend then just ignore the high strungness. If it’s your Darling Husband however, you need to ask him to give you a little more leeway in certain situations. Like for example my Darling Husband is ADHD and cannot stand it if anything in our apartment is out of place. It drives me crazy because when I get home from working out, I need a few minutes to cool down before putting all my stuff away and making the house perfect. Meanwhile Darling Husband has rearranged my hoodie and sneakers 3 times, clearly extremely disturbed that I hadn’t put them away immediately. In that scenario I had to lovingly request that he give me 10 minutes to cool off after i work out before going nutz about arranging everything 🙂

Post # 6
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

I’m the high strung one and my Fiance is the laid back one 🙂 I am always planning ahead, worrying about random things that may or may not happen, etc. It does drive my Fiance crazy and its something I continue to work on.

His whole family is SOO laid back, and I wish I was more like that. To them its normal to plan a weekend trip on a Friday at 5:00. And for me, well I need time to plan!! It’s been a big adjustment but I am trying hard to just go with the flow.

Post # 7
Member
2018 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I’m the high-strung person who drives everyone crazy:) I agree that I am the one who needs to chill out and let stuff go. I actually appreciate when people tell me calmly that I’m carrying on too much (which is why my husband is so awesome). Also, because I am so self-aware that it’s my issue, I don’t get offended. Maybe your friend just needs you tell her nicely that you operate on a different level and give a her a chance to adjust.

there’s always a chance she may freak out on you but hopefully she has a sense of humor about it:)

Post # 8
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

oh man, I am the high strung person and my FH is the laid back one. Good thing is, I already know I drive him nuts!!

Post # 9
Member
891 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

my husband and i are both high strung but he does a much better job of controlling himself and appearing “laid back” than i do.  we both have our spazzy and laid back moments though.  i can’t really commit to either one for good.  it just depends on the circumstances i guess.  sometimes i’m making mountains out of molehills and he’s telling me to relax, and sometimes it’s the other way around.  

 

 

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