Post # 1
I am 33 and have been TTC after removing paragard in May. I have been charting for 1.5 years and my periods are fine- I ovulate on day 14-15 with a 12 day luteal phase. First three cycles I did yoga, acupuncture and charting. I added in pineapple, mucinex, circle and bloom meditations, OPKs, and propping up hips afterward. This month I decided just to relax and did next to nothing except charting and BD every other day during FW. Yesterday my temp went up significantly 12 DPO. I checked it twice to be sure. BFN. This morning my temp dropped below the coverline (I checked four times, yes I am crazy). Another BFN, though AF hasn’t showed up yet as she should.
I am so frustrated, disappointed, and sad. DH has been super sweet but he’s a guy and doesn’t get it the same way. I want to quit TTC (still want kids, just hate the process) but not sure how to do it. Should I stop charting? Stop looking at these boards? Try to forget when I am ovulating? (I already know predicted date).
My two questions:
1. How do you suggest I cut the stress of TTC so it doesn’t make me crazy?
2. Some other bees suggested doing something fun when AF comes to make you feel better. Sounds like most drink wine, but I don’t really like alcohol. Any ideas?
Post # 3
I know and accept that I am a crazy person when monitoring things (like my weight).
So when we were TTC, there was no WAY I was temping/charting. I would have gone absolutely INSANE!
And while I did test earlier than planned (2 days before AF), I didn’t symptom spot from the 2 to 3 week mark! And did my best not to from 3 to 4 weeks.
Post # 4
@guitargirl: I’d stick to charting and temping, but that’s just me I feel like I have at least some control! I just keep telling myself not to freak out until its been 6mknths-1year… I know it’s hard and I hate this process too but we just have to be patient 🙁
Post # 5
I’d just stop all the charting. I will confess that I don’t really understand it, anyway. As long as you have sex 2-3 times per week when you’re due to ovulate, you’ll have a chance at getting pregnant. Too much information can be a bad thing.
Post # 6
If your periods are regular and you know when you ovulate, I would quit the temping and charting. I did that for 2 months and found it stressful. Rather, I just monitored my CM and BDed every other day during my fertile window. I’m 35 and got pregnant on the fourth cycle.
Post # 7
I’m a type A personality and couldn’t help myself with the charting, temping, OPKs, and google research. I changed so much about my lifestyle that my body started to go nutty and my cycles kept getting longer. I finally went to an herbalist and cut back on all of my ‘interventions’ to the bare minimum (charting, OPKs, and pre-seed) and her tea. That was my lucky month (and that month my cycle went back to normal). I think cutting back on the self interventions may be beneficial.
Some non-wine things you can to if you get AF is to take a bath, get a massage, eat some junk food, woop it up on the town with your Darling Husband or your girls, take an entire day and do only what you want to do, purchase (and wear) clothing you won’t be able to once pregnant, and take some advil (oh, how I miss advil! Tylenol is just a surgar pill for me).
Hang in there!
Post # 8
I’ve been TTC for 8 months now and I wish I could say it gets easier. But I cry just as hard the 7th month as I did the 3rd month.
I’ve started doing what the above PP suggested, and every time I get AF I go and do something that I couldn’t do if I were pregnant. This weeked I went on roller coasters and had sushi.
It’s best to think, “Well at least I can….” or “Now I have more me and hubby time.”
It’s tough to make the best out of a crap situation, I wish I had better advice!
Post # 9
I completely know how you fell. I was actually writing about how I feel about this on the POAS board earlier today. I am in the beginning of the TWW right now, and I’ve decided to stop charting/temping during that time. I think it’s beneficial along with OPK to determine when you ovulate, but after that I don’t have any control anyway and it just makes me crazy! I overanalyze every temp change and think about it constantly. Hopefully it helps me settle down this month- but of course here I am on the nesting boards so obviously I am still thinking about it.
Love the idea of a sushi date, (in my case red wine) or buying a new outfit. I’ve stopped buying clothes b/c “I’ll be pregnant soon” but that could take months! I think that’s a good way to enjoy the time right now and not just think about the future.
Post # 10
@guitargirl: We just started TTC this month and already I feel slightly overwhelmed. For now I refuse to chart as it just seems like too much to worry about and frankly it all confuses me.
I am pretty regular and can typically tell when I am ovulating. I think if this first time isn’t a charm I might pick up an OPK to help things out.
The worst part is the waiting. I could be pregnant right this second thanks to all our BDing this past week and I was ovulating yesterday. Now I have to wait until the 18th to test. Grrr!
Post # 11
I’m not TTC or even sexually active. Just FYI.
The stress you are feeling can make TTC more difficult. Sometimes the best thing to do, especially if there aren’t any issues as far as your cycle and fertility in general, is to have normal sex. Stop all the charting and temping and monitoring for a while and just enjoy sex with your husband. Let your body do what it’s meant to do without your worry and stress interfering with the process.