(Closed) How do you deal with waiting?

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
131 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

Oh that sucks – no doubt that would take a toll on your nerves!! That jealousy feeling is the worst (I can totally relate, not just with engagement but also babies lol) but I find that talking things out/venting usually makes me feel better. Since I’m assuming you can’t do that with your future Fiance, you could always try venting to friends and on here, of course 😊 

That and the usual stuff – keep yourself busy, catch up with friends and focus on other aspects of your life. Before you know it you’ll be engaged! 

Post # 3
26 posts
  • Wedding: July 2016

I was in the exact same position as you! It’s so hard to wait and it totally sucks but my best advice is to focus on the good… How great it is that you’re so close to being engaged, that there is a man who seriously loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you, and that he cares enough to put the effort and love into a surprise proposal! When it does happen, it will be the perfect time. In the meantime, enjoy your last days/months as “boyfriend” and “girlfriend!” 

Post # 4
358 posts
Helper bee

I had the same situation as you did and I went crazy and go jealous of others while waiting. I do wish I focused on being more excited and anticipating the next stage we were about to start together instead of making myself crazy! It is a very exciting and time! It helped me to not be so anxious by realizing the wait time for the engagement is actually very short compared to the rest of the time you will spend with him. Your proposal will end up being perfect and your ring beautiful!

Good luck, can’t wait to see your ring if you decide to post it!

Post # 5
286 posts
Helper bee

Ive been waiting for years. We picked a ring together and the last I heard it was being made. I just decided to not talk about it anymore. It’s so hard but it will happen eventually. Your man has the ring and I’m sure is trying to plan something special for you. Just focus on other things and let it be a surprise 🙂 I know it’s super hard to do. 

Post # 6
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2018

I totally understand! Waiting has been so much harder than I thought it would be!

My boyfriend purchased a ring back in February. He has no idea that I know. (I heard a voicemail from the jeweler saying that the ring came in and is ready to be picked up) and also found a receipt for a safety deposit box at the bank that same day, so I put two and two together.

My dad passed away a week after he picked up the ring, so I’m pretty sure the timing of that may have ended up throwing off his original plans. However, it has been two months and STILL nothing. I am getting so anxious.

ALL I think about is the anticipation of the proposal, especially knowing that he has the ring. HOW will he do it, WHEN will he do it, WHERE will he do it!

I get more disappointed with every passing weekend that it doesn’t happen.

I’m just trying to remind myself to enjoy the anticipation phase and count my blessings. Easier said than done!


  • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  kimber085.
Post # 7
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

While I was waiting I started planning the wedding. I started ordering items to DIY most of my things. With my job I am only home part time. So I needed to get a jump on it. Just in case I didn’t have a year by the time he asked me. I am so happy I did. 

I few friends got engaged while I was still waiting. I won’t lie. I cried and couldn’t stop my emotions. I started to feel like the planning I was doing wasn’t really going to happen. We picked out a ring. I was just waiting …  

But he did great. I am still so behind on planning. I wish I would have started even sooner. But I was worried it was pointless. Oh well

Post # 8
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2017 - historical mansion

Haha that is hilarious that he said the end of the “fiscal year.” Does that mean December? If not, that’s really funny, and I could picture my Boyfriend or Best Friend saying like that because he works with corporate taxes. My ring is being made, so I’m not quite in the waiting phase that you are. My plan is to focus on the fact that he wants it to be surprised and so he’ll be doing something special for me, and I will be doing something special (or at least *nice*) by trying to be relaxed and not anxious about it. But that’s easier said than done… Hope that helps! Try to remember that it will happen eventually and the less you think about it, the more surprising and fun it will be.

Post # 9
430 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I think you should focus on the fact that secretly you basically are engaged. You just don’t have the ring yet! It’s a fabulous little secret you get to keep to yourself. He’s already bought the ring so he will be asking soon. I doubt he’ll go months and months. He must have some fabulous surprise in store. 

Post # 10
236 posts
Helper bee

I am in the same boat. My bf had the ring already and it’s in the house and I know where it’s “hidden”. He says he isn’t going to propose until June so I am just giving myself things to look forward to every month so the time goes by faster! 

I thought waiting would be fun but it isn’t lol. 



Post # 11
1472 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I cope looking at my diamond over and over again on the JA website (hahaha weird i know but whenever i get the “itch” I look at it and just go nuts at how sparkly it is and how i can’t wait to see her in person). Just know that it WILL come as opposed to being one of those waiting bees that dont even know if he has it or if he even will propose. That always makes it a 100 times better for me. 

Post # 12
10 posts

I have a long list of other things that are coming up that I’m excited about. That way, I can look at it and think, “Yeah, it’s cool that I’m getting engaged soon, but it’s also cool that I’m going to Japan this fall! And my favorite band is playing here later this month! And I have all these great plans with my friends!” There are a lot of things in my life that I’m also looking forward to, and it helps a lot to remember them.

Post # 14
145 posts
Blushing bee

We have the ring as well but he probably won’t propose for a few months, which I struggled to cope with at first because everytime we would go out or do anything I would be IS THIS IT!!!

However, the best thing I did to cope with it actually was to tell him how hard it was knowing the ring was in the house and it made the proposal so much more real and made me so much more anxious! So we ended up having a big discussion about it which has actually relaxed me a lot, and he lets me wear the ring every now and then so I can enjoy the sparkles and love on my ringl. (is that really weird and totally non traditional??? I hope it’s not bad luck!!)

It will happen when it happens, and I’m sure your SO is just as excited to be engaged to you as you are to be engaged to him!! 

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