(Closed) How do you feel about the expression "the wife"?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
525 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

It could be worse, my Dad’s friends often refer to their SO’s as “mommy”-when she won’t let someone do something or “the old lady”.

I’d much prefer “the wife”. hahaha

Post # 4
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I completely agree with you that it is possessive and old-fashioned, but that’s actually why I don’t mind it! I flip flop between being traditional and modern when it comes to gender roles, and this is a case where I wouldn’t mind being traditional. It depends on how it’s said though. I can just see FH saying it to brag about the fact that he has a wife, and that’s ok with me 🙂

Post # 5
2556 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’d take “the wife” over “my old lady” or “the woman”.. I mean, I guess I would prefer “MY wife”, but it’s only words.  

Post # 6
4605 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Not a fan, but I’m also not a fan of “the boy” or “the boyfriend” either. FH will sometimes call me his old lady, but he’s usually joking. Either way, I don’t mind. I can handle the wife, as long as he doesn’t call me mommy.

Post # 7
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

we aren’t a fan of using titles, we use each other’s 1st name when referring to each other. It’s my DH’s biggest pet peeve (or one of them). If people know the name of your husband/wife, no need to say my husband…when talking about them, just use their damn name!

Post # 8
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My fiance refers to me as “The Misses”: As in “let me ask the misses what our plans are that night”. I think it’s cute. Sometimes he called me “The Boss” which I find to be hilarious too. I expect after we are married, he will call me The Wife. Doesn’t bother me one bit!

Post # 9
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I don’t mind it. Like others said, it’s better than some of the other ways men can refer to their wives!


Post # 10
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

@Creiddylad:  Doesn’t bother me at all. My Fiance says it and how can I get offended at something that’s true? I am his wife.

Post # 11
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I also don’t like it with the “The” at the beginning.  Makes me feel like I’m an object to possess.  Totally fine with “My” wife however.

Post # 12
9118 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Doesn’t bother me. There is a man on my husband’s crew who refers to his wife as “The wet hole” when he’s talking about her. No joke.


I told my husband he can call me whatever he wants just as long as it isn’t “the wet hole.”


He calls me Wifu.
I call him Husbutt.


Works out great


Post # 13
8823 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i don’t think I’ll have a problem with it.

i could see my FH saying, “i have to check with the wife on this one.”

pronouns as long as they are not used with negative connotation are perfectly acceptable to me. there are worse things to be upset about.

Post # 14
490 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I feel fine about it bc I call my fiance The Chad! Cool

Post # 15
10589 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

It’s my nickname for a bank account to differentiate it from his.

I grew up with my parents coming up with names like this for Christmas presents and they sign cards to each other that way too.

My ILs call each other Ma and Pa though, I find that odd.  Darling Husband didn’t think so, but he hates it if I jokingly call him Daddy so he’s not going to be using any variation of Mom for me.

Post # 16
2716 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Doesn’t bother me at all and I’m very independent.  I mean, it’s true.  In our family unit, I am the wife and he is the husband.  I don’t see it any different as referring to your kids as “the kids.”  I don’t get a possissive vibe.  But I also occasionally call my parents “the parental units” so there’s that.


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