(Closed) how do you feel about weekday weddings?

posted 5 years ago in Beehive
Post # 16
Member
3586 posts
Sugar bee

I would have to take some time off but for someone i am close to i wouldn’t mind. I work weekends including Friday so any time i want to do something i have to ask for it off. Actually my days off are Wednesday Thursday and i work at night so if i care about someone or really wanna go out i take a day. That is just me and i get paid vacation so i don’t know everyone’s situation. Someone people do have paid leave and it starts messing with their pockets.

Post # 17
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015 - The Victorian

I’m sorry, but I’m not paying an extra $4000 so someone doesn’t have to take a day off work. The vast majority of people will be able to make it, even if it’s not ideal. It’s the biggest day of my life to-date. My closest family will be there and those that can’t make it, it will be because they can’t afford the flight/hotel. Am I supposed to get married across the country and inconvenience the other half of the guest list PLUS myself? No. There will always be reasons people can’t make it, so just do what is best for you. Let them know you love them and would love to have them there, but you understand. And then invite the next people down on the list.

Post # 18
Member
3198 posts
Sugar bee

aquabee:  We had our wedding on a Friday. Those people who were going to prioritize being there were there. Those that didn’t really want to make it their priority used the fact that it was on a weekday as an excuse not to attend. Some people can’t take work off, and that is okay…you can’t work it to where everyone will be there (some people work weekends)! Do what works for you and your budget and if people can’t make it, then that is fine as they have their own lives to live and you have yours! It isn’t a reflection of how much someone loves you guys, it is just the way of life sometimes.

Post # 19
Member
2425 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

aquabee:  My wedding is going to be on a Thursday but its also 2 days away from a major holiday. If people don’t want to come to my wedding than they can easily say no. We are not chaning our date for anyone.

Post # 20
Member
1992 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I don’t know what the fuss is.  I don’t mind weekday weddings.  I don’t really go to weddings for people that I’m not close with anyway.  If I would go to your wedding on a Saturday, then I’d go any other day of the week. As long as I have notice, and can plan for it, then it’s really no biggie.  

Post # 21
Member
7371 posts
Busy Beekeeper

cmbr:  I really don’t like the “if they love you, they’ll be there no matter what day it is” thing.

I’m so sick of that attitude. Because if so why doesn’t it work in reverse? If you really want your guests there, you’ll do whatever to accommodate them, right?Guess what, you don’t. The couple has their own limitations (budgets), preferences and criteria. But guests have to push everything aside (cost, vacation time, other obligations be damned) we are jugdged as not caring enough. What a crock of crap. 

Post # 22
Member
2878 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

aquabee: I have traveled cross country for weddings. Like jump on a red eye, check in to the hotel, grab a nap and a coffee, get ready and go to the wedding, pass out, check out and head home kind of travel. 

Weekday weddings are the only ones I miss because my vacation time is allocated to seeing family during Thanksgiving and Christmas. 

It doesn’t matter how much notice I have, I’ve prioritzed family during the holidays.

It has zero to do with how much I love the bride and groom and 100% to do with logistics. I would be offended if they took offense because choosing to get married during the week is what put me in the position of having to decline. 

they can pick whatever date works best for them as long as they gracefully accept regrets. 

Post # 23
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I actually would not be allowed to take a day off work for a friend’s wedding (maybe a family member’s tho). If it was later in the evening I’d definitely go! I might not be apt to stay as long as on a Saturday tho because I’m always exhausted from work when I get home.

Post # 24
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Fiance and I are getting married on a Monday morning at 11AM, so it’s safe to say I am ok with weekday weddings! It’s the anniversary of our first date, so it has significant meaning to us. We are fully prepared that about half of our invited guests won’t be able to make it, but know that it won’t mean they ‘love us less’… nothing will work with everyone’s schedules 100% of the time. 

 

Plus, it’s cheaper and we would rather spend our money on traveling the world than a fancy wedding to feed a bajillion people. 🙂

Post # 25
Member
930 posts
Busy bee

I think it can be really inconvenient for guests. For example, I only get 3 personal days a year so I have to really plan on my days off. However, I would do my best to be there. One thing to consider is your wedding party. If you have a rehersal on Thursday, they may need to take 2 or more days off work due to travel and what not.

Post # 26
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee

Fridays are pretty common now. People are going to complain about something or another so if you wanna do it friday go for it. And ive actually seen people do their rehersals the weekend before just so people arent inconvienanced on a thursday.  just throwing a thought out there…Were getting married on a Sunday and it was actually cheaper than both a Friday and Saturday night. its not an early wedding – 5:30 ceremony and reception goes til 11 so it’ll still be the same as if it were a Friday or saturday. and then people can decide if they want to take a day off that monday to recover or they can go into work and not have to take a day. There was just no way we were able to afford a saturday, or friday for that matter, at our venue that i completely fell in love with. If people want to complain its on a sunday then oh well ! As PPs said, the people who matter will make it happen and be there. So I say do what you want. It’s your wedding and saturday weddings are just so costly that it makes no sense if you’re on a budget.

Post # 27
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Walt Paraiso, Esterillos, Costa Rica

We’re having a Friday afternoon wedding as well and we have heard a little bit of complaining. It will be at the coast, about two hours for most of the groom’s friends and family (destination wedding gift my side) BUT we will be picking up part of the cost of a chartered coach for the day of and a return that night. A good number don’t have personal vehicles nor do we want anyone to be burdened with the addition of a hotel stay. It is also the weekend following Easter/Holy Week which means people here in Costa Rica will have just had a week of vacation already however my sister is in medical school and it was the only weekend that she has break. We decided on Friday over Saturday because we don’t want to be saying goodbye to far-traveling family and guests the night of the reception if they need to be on planes Sunday to make it back to work/school Monday. As it stands now, we’ll get to have some relaxed time with them and even have a dedicated celebration for some birthdays that fall on the same weekend. We really hope that most locals can make it work but honestly, the priority is on the guests we rarely get to see. 

Post # 28
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

aquabee:  we are getting married on Friday at 530 half the guest list is out of town so it doesn’t matter to them, as to the rest if their our friends they can take 1/2 a day off…or not…and the Christmas card list will be shorter…lol

Post # 29
Member
7450 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

” if people love you and want to be there they will go no matter what day your wedding is on”

I hate it when people say this. I live out of town from most of my family and friends so a Friday wedding would require me to take two days off of work. I’m already very short on vacation time so I would be pretty skeptical about doing this unless it was for a sibling or for a very best friend. I sure do love my cousins but taking two days off of work would be a difficult decision for me. Please do not go into this with these thoughts because that’s really not fair for those who don’t receive a ton of vacation time.

Post # 30
Member
9527 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Would a Monday be an option? You can book a Monday that is a national holiday so people will be off anyway and it will still be less than on the weekend. Ours is on a Sunday with the monday a government holiday, our family and friends who have that day off thanked us for being so thoughtful.

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