Post # 1
I would have thought these would be compliments. But since being proposed to I feel they are a polite way of hinting they dislike the ring. I know all that matters is my opinion at the end of the day but I’m finding these comments are starting to make me feel like I have made the wrong decision. I adored the ring when I first picked it. Has anyone had a similar experiance? How did you put these thoughs aside. Even hearing that it’s big is making me feel guilty and self conscious.
Post # 4
I think you’re being way too sensitive and reading into things. If I say something is interesting or unique, I pretty much mean exactly that. It’s not a a way for me to tell you I really think it’s ugly.
Post # 5
@TG123: It makes me feel like it’s probably not their style, and yes, maybe they even think it’s ugly.
But who cares. I LOVE my ring for so many reasons. It’s unique, antique, awesome, handmade, not some cookie-cutter big-box jewelry store ring, and one of a kind.
Not everyone likes everything that you like, and vise versa. I love my hair long, FI likes it best short. My best friend likes rap music, I hate it. Life goes on.
Post # 6
I know I am being sensitive I can identify with everything you girls are saying. It that’s effected me alot more than I thought it would.
Post # 7
I recently called someones ring unique, because it is. It is a raw cut opal. That being said, I absolutely adore it! It’s so amazing and beautiful… But it’s not at all traditional. There’s nothing wrong with that though 🙂
Post # 8
People are going to comment on everything you do as you plan your wedding. Take it as an opportunity to work on being a bit less sensitive? People are going to comment on your budget, colors, invitation, how many bridesmaids, time of year, etc. People have comments for everything! Comments don’t mean they are being rude either, they are likely just tyring to make conversation.
Take their comments as complements. Even if they don’t like your ring, who cares? Not everyone is going to like everything. What’s important is that you like your ring
I recently told my friend I thought her ring was unique, because it is unique. That doesn’t mean I don’t like it, in fact, I LOVE it. Her design kinda made me wish I had thought about getting a ring like that!
Post # 9
I get that “unique and interesting” comment alot, but I don’t get offended because I knew that I wanted something unique….and not everyone likes unique things….if they did….then it would become “trendy”..and would not be unique anymore..lol.
Post # 10
People call my ring unique all the time – because it is. It’s from the 1920’s and no one I know has ever scene one like it. So I take it as a compliment.
Post # 11
It depends. I don’t know if I’d feel good about someone calling it “interesting” because usually when I hear that it’s in a fake-polite context.
But I LOVE when people tell me my ring is unique or different. Usually women say that when they see the ‘peek-a-boo’ diamonds in my e-ring, and that’s EXACTLY the reason I hinted to DH that I wanted them- because it makes my solitaire a little different.
Post # 12
I have always been insecure about anything and everything. I know this I am trying to hard not to let it get to me but I am already considering remodeling it smaller and something more traditional. I am terrified people will think it is costume jewlery.
Post # 13
Honestly, very few people take the time to come up with thoughtful, personal compliments of engagement rings, and very often, compliments are totally well-intentioned, but entirely generic.
If your stone is over like 1.5 carats, I bet you’ll hear “what a rock!” over and over again.(Depending on where you live, I suppose.)
If your stone is under a half carat, you’ll hear “It’s so dainty, I love it!” over and over again.
If your ring is rose gold, that’s the compliment you’ll get the most. “Oh, I love rose gold! So unique!” Over and over and over.
If you have a pave band or a halo, you’ll get “Wow, so sparkly!” over and over again.
People try to give you nice compliments; they say they like it, and then they say something more specific about the ring to show they’re being sincere. If your ring is a unique style, I don’t blame them for saying so. They’re trying to be nice. I know it’s easy to mistake that particular phrase for veiled criticism; growing up as an artistic child and being called “unique” when people mean “weird” certainly taught me that lesson well.
But if I were you, I’d interpret “What a unique ring!” as “I like it and I’m happy for you but I’m not creative enough to think of another way to say this”. Which is totally fine. They mean well! Take the compliment, and enjoy your ring. 🙂
Post # 14
I like it. It’s all in the tone. I can tell they mean it in a positive way.
If there were an awkward pause between the “it’s…” and the “unique” or something, that would be different, but wouldn’t it be the same if they said “it’s… beautiful” in the same way?
ETA: I also don’t spend a lot of time thinking about whether they really actually like my ring or were just being polite. Just being polite is good enough, only I need to love my ring (and I do!) 🙂
Post # 15
I don’t get offended if I hear “interesting, different or unique” because my ring is interesting, different and unique. It’s a purple sapphire. It’s not the norm…and that’s why I chose it! FI and I wanted to get something unique, so it would bum me out if people thought it looked common. Maybe there are people out there who use those comments as code for saying they think it’s ugly, but I don’t care. I love my ring, FI loves my ring, and that’s all that matters!
Just own it! 🙂
Post # 16
It is totally all in someone’s tone and the pauses. What threw I me into ring regret in the first place was when i first showed my hair dresser the ring she asked if he was buying me a engement ring. I was like. Oh this is the ring. . . I think since that moment I have been really insecure about it and almost guessing what people will say about it