(Closed) How do you handle awkward ring questions from a friend?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

tell her you don’t know what it cost, and don’t want to know. simple as that.

 

if she pushes the issue, you can be rude. it’s none of her business, really.

 

Post # 4
Member
7456 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

Sounds like she’s in the market for an upgrade. I would say “Im not sure how much it was, Fiance bought it for me.” even if you actually do know how much it was.

Post # 5
Member
7759 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t mind telling ring details, but once she asks financial questions it’s appropriate to say, “Sorry but it’s none of your business”. Or it you think that’s too blunt, you could say, “That’s between (fiance’s name) and me” or “It’s a secret”.

Post # 6
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Yeah, I agree that you should just say you don’t know how much it was. When I’m asked how much my ring was, I usually tend to joke and say “It was a million billion dollars!” or “Husband got it out of a gumball machine, so only 20 cents!”

Post # 8
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Laur12:  tell her that you’re not sure and that that doesn’t matter to you. She probably is unhappy with her own things and wants to know so she can feel better about herself. ignore her.

Post # 10
Member
3825 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

that sounds weird. sounds like she’s sizing you up – trying to draw a comparison between you and Fiance and her and her Fiance. it’s petty and unncessary. i would tell her that it’s personal and you can not disclose that information. then i would distance myself from her. seems like she’s worried about all the wrong things.

Post # 11
Member
1105 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Wow. Just say you don’t know. Your friend is obviously very insecure! Who cares if they are similar, so many engagement rings are similar! It’s hard to find 12353151 variations on a diamond… 

I honestly have no idea how much mine cost and I really don’t want to know either!

Post # 12
Member
547 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I actually had a similar situation and I agree with PPs, just tell her you don’t know how much it was. No need to call her out unless it keeps happening after you say you don’t know. I had a friend who kept saying things about how much bigger my ring was than hers, how much shinier, etc. etc.  I do not do well in awkward situations like that, so I usually just changed the subject and/or ignored it. It stopped eventually. 

Post # 13
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I cant stand “one uppers” i would just ignore her or say “why does something like that matter so much to you”

i have friends like that too. My close friend/one of my bridesmaid and her boyfriend recently got engaged after me and my fiance did. Our wedding isnt till june 2014. They are planning their for this years. I flat out told her i dont want this to be any sort of comparisson contest/ bridewars 2. They are both our wedding and we are both in theirs.

goodluck

Post # 15
Member
2778 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Laur12:  I would have never never complied to that request to take off my ring.  Who in their right mind asks that?  From that start I would have said I don’t know but know that you have I agree with PP’s tell her I don’t know or to mind her own business.  You could also tell her the store or steer her to any store but at this point its gone too far.  That is just so super rude of her

Post # 16
Member
7485 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@Laur12:  There’s a saying that says something like “never attibute to malice something that could just as easily be attributed to ignorance.” I think that applies here. Unless you know her to be a petty and jealous person, I would simply assume she’s thinking about upgrading (or possibly even just curious) and doesn’t realize how uncomfortable her questions are. I would not immediately assume she’s jealously judging you. Just tell her you don’t know the cost, or if you want to kind of make a point, say “I would never dream of asking something like that, that’s his business not mine.” 

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