(Closed) How do you honestly feel about someone not having their sister as Maid of Honor?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1715 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

My little sister is a bridesmaid but my best friend is my Maid/Matron of Honor. However she is very young (only 14) and we arent extremely close. I dont see a problem with it keep in mind her friends are probably imature spoiled brats who want it to be ME ME ME. I think your doing the right thing.

Post # 4
Member
46421 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Why worry so much about what other people think? Especially your sister’s 18 yr old friends who have no idea what choices they will make when it’s their turn, and your sister is ok with it.

I did not have any of my sisters as my Maid/Matron of Honor. I asked my best girlfriend. Like you, it just made more sense to have her as my Maid/Matron of Honor.

Post # 5
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m 25, my sister is 21. She’s not my moh. She’s actually 6th out of my 6 bms. She’s ok with it and never said a word.

Post # 6
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

I don’t care and it’s no one’s place to judge what the bride does in that respect. The maid/matron of honor should be the closest female to the bride, whether that be a cousin, sister or best friend. It really doesn’t and shouldn’t matter to anyone, and to be honest, I don’t understand why people get so upset over it when it’s none of their business. It doesn’t make the bride horrible, just someone with different relationships than other people. Age is irrelevant as well. If you have more than one maid of honor, it takes away the “honor” part of the title.

It is ok to have your sister as a guest, since that is an honor in itself, contrary to belief. Not everyone wants to be standing up front with the couple, but that doesn’t make them a horrible person or any less supportive.

 

 

Post # 7
Member
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

can your sister even sign the marriage license as your MoH ?

My sister was part of my bridal party but I have 3 friends who are closer to me than she is. We were perfectly fine with that. 

I have to ask – why do you care so much about what a bunch of 18 year olds think anyway? :s

Post # 7
Member
14497 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If the sisterly relationship doesnt warrent putting her in as Maid/Matron of Honor, then I think it makes total sense that she’s not.

Post # 8
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

In the US, anyone 18 or older can sign the marriage certificate (which shows that the wedding took place legally) as a witness.

Post # 8
Member
793 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

First off, just wanted to say that I don’t have a sister, if that matters. But I don’t think it’s weird at all to have your sister just be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and not Maid/Matron of Honor. I know that lots of people are closer with their friends than their siblings (and vice versa) and have chosen their friends as Maid/Matron of Honor. I think it is your decision, and since both you and your sister are completely fine with this, it’s no big deal! Some people just need to learn to mind their own business, and realize that different people have different situations!

Post # 10
Member
515 posts
Busy bee

None of my sisters are bridesmaids at all. I really don’t think it matters.

Post # 11
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m not sure my sister will be in the wedding. She’s 15, and I feel like I would be excluding her from going to the bachelorette party and she can’t really throw a shower or help with it financially. My brothers aren’t groomsmen, and might be ushers. But I think that shes just too young to get to enjoy it. I’ll make sure shes there with me to get dressed and feels like shes part of everything, but I don’t know why she has to stand up there during the ceremony when were not that close. So theres no judgement from me.

Post # 12
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Your Maid/Matron of Honor should be the person closest to you regardless of whether that’s your sister (or even brother, for that matter) or best friend. Just because you share a set of genes with someone doesn’t mean that they automatically get that job. Then again, I’m also an only child so maybe there’s some unspoken sibling law that I’m unaware of.

Post # 13
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it and if both you and your sister are happy with the situation, who cares what anyone else thinks?!?!   Honestly, my first reaction when seeing the title was “well, that’s a bit odd” but then I read that she is 18 years old.   She’s at a completely different place in life than you and doesn’t sound like she’s capable of filling the role of Maid/Matron of Honor properly, nor does it sound like something she really wants to do right now anyway.   Everyone will know she’s your sister so it doesn’t make her any less special.  If you want to incorporate her in a special way, ask her to make a toast at your wedding or something along those lines.

Bottom line though is that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, whether they are 18, 26, or 47.  It’s a personal decision between you and your sister – you both seem happy with it so it’s nobody else’s business.

Post # 14
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

No one else should care…..but that’s never how it is. I didn’t have my sister in the wedding at all (we have never been close -she wouldn’t have wanted to be involved either) but I know DH’s family thought I was the devil for not having her in it. 

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